The Reasonable Person

A New Year and a New Way of Life

2009-01-21T09:06:00.003-06:00

Well, it has been a hellava year. I guess when I start getting texts asking when I'm going to update my blog, it has been too long. Of course I had the usual holiday stuff going on... presents to buy, wrap, and hide... meals to cook... kids to entertain over long breaks from school... you know, the usual hectic chaos that accompany most holidays for most people. I also have been taking two electives for school on a modified schedule meaning each class only meets 6 times and then you have a final exam. I took one exam last week, and I think it went pretty well. I have another exam next week, and I am really worried about how this will go. The good news there is... its a take home test. Good... you can use any resources you have to answer the questions. Bad... the questions are usually harder on a take home. So, I expect to spend my weekend hashing out answers and questioning whether I really learned anything.

The other big news is....

My husband and I have split up. Yes, you read it right. The complaint has been filed for the big "D" and we are in the 'waiting stages'. I know, I know... none of you would have expected that. I'm not going to say too much except that things are amicable, the kids are well cared for, and I thoroughly expect everything to turn out okay in the end. Sure its sad sometimes. But every end is also a beginning. We are the best of friends, but we have grown apart. I guess those things happen sometimes. I have gotten a lot of flack from some friends and/or family. Let me just say, we feel like we did everything we could. I am not going to sit and second guess the decisions now. We have made some untraditional compromises for the sake of the children. People don't understand the choices, they don't understand my choices, and I am sick of defending myself. I am prepared to be happy. End of story.

Part of why I haven't been around is I was trying to decide how to tell you all what has been going on. I had to get my head around some things before I could write about them. I've also had limited internet at my temporary abode. I debated whether to say anything at all, but I think I've shared plenty of other personal stuff and it would be unfair not to include one of the biggest things that probably ever happens to a person. Mostly, I don't want any sympathy. I don't want to hear I'm sorry, and don't ask me if I'm okay. I am sorry sometimes too, and I am, and will be, fine.

All that said... Lets make this a great new year. And if nothing else, at least I know when I don't have a friend here to talk to I always have all of you. Thank you for that.

Totally Awkward... What day is this?

2008-12-31T08:09:00.003-06:00

So, I was thinking today was Tuesday, and I was all ready to play along with Tova Darling. Then I realized, today is Wednesday. No matter though, after being home with the kids for nearly 2 weeks straight, having Christmas, Santa, more Christmas with various relatives, I am having a hard time keeping straight what day it is and where I am supposed to be. Forgive me, however, I will regain my senses once the children go back to school. In the meantime, bear with me, I have two stories today for your reading enjoyment....

Child #4 started Kindergarten this year. He went to pre-K last year at the elementary school because he needs speech therapy, and I desperately needed to get him out of my hair...uummm... he desperately needed some structure in his day. He has what his doctor termed as the most classic case of ADHD she has ever seen. We started him on some medication, not a stimulant, but something that would take the edge off his constant fidgeting and climbing and talking and... well, the medicine has worked pretty well, but it was tricky finding just the right amount at the right times. The first week of Kindergarten was pretty rough. They have a smiley face system, in which everyone starts on a green face, if you have been warned 3 times about behavior you move to yellow and get a note home, then another 2 times and you move to red face and go to the prinicpals office. Child #4 had a note home every day that first week of school for various infractions of class rules. Then Friday came, and I was so glad that week was almost over. School gets out at 3pm and the bus delivers my children to the door around 3:45pm. At 3:30pm I got a call from the school. It was the prinicipal.
Mrs. B: Are your children home yet?
Me: No, is everything ok?
Mrs. B: Well, I wanted to talk to you about an incident that happened today.
Me: What did he do? (note here: the rest of my school age children are girls, I knew it related to Child #4)
Mrs. B: While the children were lined up to get on their respective busses or in car rider lines (and the parents were lined up in cars outside, and the busses were lined up outside), Child #4 pulled the fire alarm. We know it was him, Mrs. T watched him do it.
Me: (being totally silent and thinking WTF?!?!)
Mrs. B: We called the fire department and cancelled the call, reset the alarm, and I talked to him for a minute, but he didn't seem very sorry about it. Maybe you can explain to him how important it is not to do that unless there is a fire.
Me: Thank you.... I will certainly talk to him when he gets home. I am so sorry. He really knows better.
Of course, when the kids got off the bus, everyone wanted to be the first to tell me he had pulled the fire alarm. I sat down on the porch with him and asked him what he was thinking, we certainly know better than to pull a fire alarm when there isn't a fire, yes? And he said, "but mama, I didn't pull it.... I lifted it! I didn't know it would go off, I thought there was something inside you had to pull. Besides... I can't read! If Mrs. V (his K teacher) would have taught me to read, I would have known it said if I lifted it it would go off!" Bless his heart. This is true... we have always talked in terms of not pulling fire alarms. This one you have to lift to set it off. No wonder he didn't seem very sorry. Child #4, being literal as always, did not see things the way we did. Its a blessing and a curse. So, we revised our discussion to include not touching fire alarms unless there is a fire. And on Monday I had him go back and apologize to Mrs. B and promise to never do that again. So far.... so good.... on that at least.

In other news, I was trying to be a fun and entertaining mama (and not have the kids trash the house any more than it already is) and took my kids to the zoo on Monday. It was a pretty good time. We wandered around, the boys got to run off some energy, they played on the really huge jungle gym. We watched the monkeys swing around and walk tightropes while the boys tried to get their attention by making monkey noises and hopping around. We at lunch at the zoo restaurant. Looked at all the spiders and snakes in the reptile building. Brushed and petted every single goat in the petting zoo area. I spent 7 hours at the zoo. I was really sure the kids would be worn out. No such luck. Just me. I was worn out and the kids were pumped up. How does this happen? It just reminds me of why I don't teach school. I love kids, I think they are hilarious, but how on earth do you survive the energy? Maybe I need to take more vitamins....

Totally Awkward Tuesdays

2008-12-23T09:35:00.003-06:00

Tova Darling had a wonderful idea for Tuesday blogging. Every Tuesday you can post a Totally Awkward story on your blog. Then, leave a comment telling Tova you've participated, and also link from your blog from hers, and she'll include a link to your blog in her post - that way, we can all cringe/laugh /die of shame together! The awkward story can be anything - something awkward you saw, you did, or you were unwittingly a part of; the most awkward moment of your week or the most awkward moment of your life.

So... here goes.....

By the way- this one reminds me a lot of a story that Vodka Mom over at I Need a Martini Mom could relate. I'm sure she has had something similar happen. Kids....

When my twins were in first grade they were learning their "letter partners". You know, when you put two letters together and they make a new sound, like /ch/, /oo/, or /sh/. The letter partners they were working on were /sh/ and the teacher had the kids sitting around in a circle on the floor. They were talking about the letters and the teacher asked them to think of words that started with /sh/. The kids were taking turns raising their hands... "shoe", "shirt", "shelf".... my sweet Child #3 (who just never gets into trouble) raises her hand and says she knows one, but she thinks it might be a "bad word". The teachers says, "well, we probably shouldn't say it at school then, thank you Child #3". The teacher goes around a few more times... "she", "shine", "shore", and then Child #3 raises her hand again.
Teacher: yes Child #3?
Child #3: how about "shit"?
Teacher: Child #3! I thought we decided we wouldn't say that one at school!
Child #3: but it starts with /sh/!
Note home to Mama. Please discuss with child #3 that we should not say bad words at school, even if they start with the letter partners of the week. I'm not sure which is worse, the fact that my 6 year old child knew the word and knew how to spell it, or that the teacher didn't realize that word was eventually going to be said. I mean, it is one of the more common 'bad words' out there. I'd like to think if it weren't my child, it would have been someone elses.

Next Tuesday.... the story of the fire alarm..... I know, I can see you all on the edges of your seat. Yeah... its that good. And he sure to check out Tova Darling and play along!

Friday Fragments

2008-12-19T07:59:00.004-06:00

- Child #5 woke up this morning and said he felt sick. Then he ate two chocolate covered donuts. I thought all was well. Then he puked them up on the couch. Thankfully its leather.

- I have one more class before Christmas break. Then I have 3 classes after break, then exams. I really want to get all my reading done for all the rest of the classes over the holidays. Then I can study for exams. I know, its ambitious, but I'm going to try.

- I signed up to take Immigration Law and the instructor quit. They have a new instructor, but she can't teach at that time. The class is cancelled/put on hold. Damn.

- My 12 year old wants some of those fancy furry boots. I think I may look at TJ Maxx because I don't know where a Payless is and Target didn't have any.

- My 22 year old brother bought his girlfriend (who I just love) an engagement ring and trusted me enough to help him pick it out. He isn't going to give it to her until this summer (for a lot of weird reasons), so he has also trusted me to keep it in my safe until he is ready. Right after he paid for it, he looked at me and said "Shit, now I really have to do this" and then laughed nervously. Its funny to see him being grown-up.

- I'm being overwhelmed with crafts from kids. I did get a really cute ornament though- in case any of you are crafty.... You take a plain colored Christmas ball, drizzle some glue on the top part the toss on some white confetti paper or sparkles, then glue an ice cream cone on the bottom. It makes an adorable little ice cream cone ornament.

- The high today is 66. I love it. I wish it never got colder than this. Ever.

- It has been foggy here for the last several days. I live out in the middle of nowhere and the fog + winding + curvy roads = a mess. It has taken me forever to get anywhere. Especially at night.

- My mother in law got me this thing called "elf on the shelf". Its an elf that watches and reports back to santa. You move him around each night and the kids have to find him. Its like a real life Wheres Waldo game. Kinda. For all you Christmas-y folks out there, you'd probably love it.

- I figured out the perfect gift for my husband. I am getting his garage doors fixed on his workshop. I know it sounds weird, but he has been complaining about them for so long I figured it was worth it. I exceeded the spending limit, but its something we would have had to do anyway. And since he kept saying he was going to do it, I figure this will save him at least a day of messing with something he doesn't want to do.

Cold

2008-12-18T19:24:00.003-06:00

I grew up in Northern Indiana, just east of Chicago. It was cold there. It snowed. A lot. I happened to live on the east side of Lake Michigan, and being that it is a huge lake it creates what we liked to call "lake effect snow", meaning that as the storm crossed the lake from west to east it picked up a ton of water out of the lake and deposited it on my fair city in the form of snow. Like 4 feet of it at a time. I always swore I would leave that dreadful weather for somewhere warmer. When I had a chance to move south, I took it. I interviewed with a couple places in Jacksonville, Florida and in Nashville, Tennessee. I took the job offer in Tennessee and have lived here for the last 10 years. I love hot weather, I hate cold weather. We get lots of hot, and not too much cold. It only snows, on average, a few inches every year and it is usually melted and gone in a day. The caveat to this lack of snow is that schools close at the threat of a winter storm, everyone rushes out to buy enough bread and milk for a month, and absolutely NO ONE knows how to drive in inclement weather (including torrential rain). I digress.... when we got up this morning it was really cold. So cold, in fact, that I just had to trek outside in my pajamas and bathrobe and get a picture of this....

Not to worry though. The high today was 55 and everything is just nice and wet again.

Christmas Tip #487

2008-12-17T11:45:00.002-06:00

Preschool children do NOT understand a gift exchange. I don't mind going out and buying the $5 gift for a particular gender child, but unless we are all buying the same gift the outcome is not going to be pretty.

Today I went to Target to pick up the last few things I needed for the class Christmas parties, and get the water and snack for my son's Kindergarten class. Tomorrow is Child #5's Christmas party and gift exchange at his twice a week preschool. We wandered Target and I found a pair of snowman socks for $1, a package of Cars stickers for $1, and a puzzle for $3. I thought I had a good thing going. Until Child #5 saw the puzzle. He claimed it as his own. I've tried to explain the gift exchange concept, but I think its lost on a 4 year old. No, he doesn't want to trade "his" puzzle to his friend and his friend give him a surprise present. He wants "his" puzzle. Its a freakin $3 puzzle! I even tried to convince him that if he really wanted it maybe Santa would bring another one just for him.... it would be like you both had this awesome present. NO. That does not work. For the past 3 plus hours all I've heard is intermittent whining about this damn puzzle.

My tip to all you folks out there considering a gift exchange for your young children: Don't even think that it will be so cute to have all the kiddos exchange stuff because its going to turn into a throwdown fight when someone else has whatever cheap ass gift it is that your kid wants. Boycot it. Its not worth it.

5:08 a.m.

2008-12-16T09:01:00.003-06:00

I am sound asleep. The phone rings. It is 5:08 a.m. I answer. It is a recorded message. A cheery voice greets me.

"Good Morning! This is Director of Schools 'Happy Lady'. 'Your' County Schools are closed today due to inclement weather. Have a Wonderful snow day!"

I hung up and returned to bed. Swearing obscenities at this chipper woman who called me to tell me that even though I have a paper to write for class tonight and was counting on children going to school today, and even though Christmas break starts next week and they will have a full two weeks off school, they will be fighting and screaming under my feet ALL DAY LONG.

Thanks.

Broke....

2008-12-15T10:43:00.005-06:00

I'm sure I've posted before about how absolutely sweet and adorable my youngest child is. He is one of my most loving children, randomly telling me he loves me and stealing all my kisses.
Friday someone snuck into our house and replaced that sweet boy with one that threw tantrums and screamed for most of the day. First he wanted play-doh (which I hate anyway) and I told him he could play it if he kept it on the table. About 30 minutes later, with play-doh everywhere, I asked him to pick up the mess and he told me no. Wrong answer. So I told him he was going to time out. He then told me he was going to Nama's house (my mom who lives next door) to have her spank me. Great, except Nama isn't home. So he stood by the front door and we played a lovely game of open and shut the door in the freezing cold. I finally had enough and told him now he was in time out again for not listening and put him on the couch to sit. He kicked and screamed the whole time. I went out of the room, thinking that ignoring the tantrum would bring us all down a notch. As I walked back into the room, he leaned over the arm of the couch and did this......
and then this.....

and more of this.....

I'm not sure what happened to my sweetest most adorable little boy, but if you find him would you please return him as soon as possible? I don't like this new upgraded version.

Choices

2008-12-12T10:17:00.003-06:00

I have two choices and one week in which to make a decision.

Our law school has about 800 students give or take. There are two terms: you can start on the traditional schedule of August to May, or you can do the other term which is February to November. For the second term, orientation for new students is the first week of February. The Dean of the School called me a couple weeks ago and said she needed a favor. Uh...sure...whatever you want. She wants me to speak at the orientation for incoming first years- do a 15 minute speech about what its like to be a student, then do a 15 minute Q&A afterwards. I was really honored that she chose me out of all the possibilities and gladly accepted.

Last week my husband told me that we could go to Ireland for a week. We would be going with my friend who works with him and her husband. This is the same guy I wrote about who is a total jerky. Besides the obvious problem of spending a long flight and then a week with them... we would also be going during the first week of February. Meaning... I would need to miss the orientation. I could call the Dean and explain the situation, and I'm sure she would understand. But do I really want to do that? Really?

What do you all think.... skip my shining glory moment at orientation to go to Ireland with husband, friend, and her jackass husband? Or claim I'm too busy?

Just to be Fair

2008-12-11T11:02:00.004-06:00

Since I ranted and raved like a lunatic yesterday about how awful these two very condensed classes are, and how that results in my lack of time for anything other than dreadful reading, I thought in fairness I should also mention a few other things.

1) my wireless internet quit on me. this shouldn't be a big deal, since I can easily sit at my desk, plug computer directly into the modem and happily surf the internet. I have a nice large desk, with pictures on it and a window to look out of while I ponder deep thoughts. BUT, I don't have a nice desk chair. In fact, I have one of my mother's hard-ass wooden kitchen chairs. As appealing as the internet is to me, I just can't stand to sit that long on this super-hard chair. I gave my husband a couple choices: a) get the damn wireless working so I can sit on the couch or 2) get me a nice big comfy chair with wheels that I can sit at the desk and spin around in. So far, I have neither.

2) I have been inundated with Christmas party requests. Now, I am not all saddened by this. I actually enjoy the fact that my childrens schools still refer to it as "Christmas Party" and "Christmas Break". As un-PC as that may be, when you live out in the boonies and your entire community lacks any indicia of diversity you can still call it what is for most of the kids. My problem is, I now have to find a $5 boy gift, a $5 girl gift, 48 stocking stuffers, a tub of white frosting, a bag of chocolate chips, and enough Christmas plates and napkins for 20 kindergartners. All by next week. Thank goodness we have a Dollar General nearby.

3) To go along with all the Christmas parties being held at schools, I also have the pleasure of attending every Christmas program known to man. It started with a luncheon at Child #5's preschool, then we moved on to a Christmas play presented by the second grade, Child #1 had a Choral concert in which the middle school visited the elementary schools and which I was expected to come watch. Cihld #1 then had extra practice for her band concert which is tonight. And next week I will be partying it up with a bunch of 5 year olds while making candy crafts.

4) Child #1 has been full of drama the last couple weeks. It started because she has a winter semi-formal dance this friday. Opposite sex dates are optional. I was strongly encouraging her to just go with her friends. She really wanted to have a "date" without having a date and would hope that her best guy friend would go with her. She mustered up the nerve to ask him, and he said no. The reason he said no is "because you are my best friend". She came home and in between sobbing and fist pounding manages to get out the conversation, promptly followed by a big "WTF does that mean?!?" I told her, in the most motherly way possible, that I was sure he just didn't feel comfortable going with you- his best friend- and that as boys get older they realize they can go to dances as "just friends". Its all about appearances honey. To add to the excitement, she also has auditions for Mid-State Band this Saturday. She is really stressed about the music and stuff, while I am looking forward to sitting in my folding chair and reading for 6 hours while surrounded by talented middle school musicians practicing their scales. Its looking like it will be a super fun saturday.

So..... while I would like to (and certainly will) blame my lack of free time on my school, I suppose I could admit half-heartedly that I have brought some of this upon myself. And I say that only because I realize that I am the one who brought these needy little ankle biters into this world. However, I will also in true Christmas spirit spread the blame around a little more because if the holidays weren't so hectic I would have a lot more time to read blogs. My wish from Santa... peace at home and goodwill to brothers and sisters.

I Ain't Quittin You....

2008-12-10T13:49:00.003-06:00

Or something like that. I know I've been absent for a few days. Some of you may have noticed (or not). I am beginning to wonder just exactly what I was thinking when I signed up for two electives during the winter term. Granted, each class is one credit hour and completed in just six weeks. Sounds great, yes? Sure, until you realize that you have to go to class for 4 hours at a time for each of the six weeks. And then you have to read all the shit they assign you every week.

As an example, for one class we get about 6 cases per week, average say 15 pages each- total about 100 pages. He also assigns us to read some actual trial transcripts, average about 130 pages. He then would like us to either a) read his jury charge and complete the verdict form, average another 25 pages OR b) write an opinion granting or denying whatever requested relief we just read about, average another 3 typed pages.

But wait.... there's more! Behind door number two is the other class. Same hours, even more shit to read. And let me just say, the topic is so god awful that I considered coughing up the $50 the school charges and just dropping the class after the first night. Yes... it is that bad. His assignments come from a book, and thankfully there are no projects involved, but after reading 200 pages of very dense crap you end up with a massive migraine, or something pretty close to it.

So... if I have been unusually quiet or haven't commented, now you know why. I'm not out baking cookies or doing fun stuff with the kids. I am drowning in paper. And who am I kidding anyway, if I weren't drowning in paper I certainly wouldn't be baking cookies anyway- I'd be here.... telling you all about why I refuse to bake cookies...

Holiday Humor a.k.a Don't Take Men Shopping

2008-12-04T15:59:00.003-06:00

I got this email as a joke from a friend of mine and nearly peed my pants. So, because the holidays are upon us and some of you may be tempted to force your husband/significant other into doing some shopping with you... consider the following as a public service announcement (or, if you want to get out of shopping, consider any or all of the following):

After I retired, my wife insisted that I accompany her on her trips to Wal- Mart.
Unfortunately, like most men, I found shopping boring and preferred to get in and get out.
Equally unfortunately, my wife is like most women - she loved to browse.
Yesterday my dear wife received the following letter from the local Wal- Mart:

Dear Mrs. Samsel,
Over the past six months, your husband has been causing quite a commotion in our store .
We cannot tolerate this behavior and have been forced to ban both of you from the store . Our complaints against Mr. Samsel are listed below and are documented by our video surveillance cameras.

1. June 15: Took 24 boxes of condo ms and randomly put them in people's carts when they weren't looking.

2. July 2: Set all the alarm clocks in House wares to go off at 5- minute intervals.

3. July 7: Made a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the women 's restroom.

4. July 19: Walked up to an employee and told her in an official voice , 'Code 3 in House wares . Get on it right away.'

5. August 4: Went to the Service Desk and tried to put a bag of M& M's on layaway.

6. August 14: Moved a ' CAUTION - WET FLOOR ' sign to a carpeted area.

7. August 15: Set up a tent in the camping department and told other shoppers he'd invite them in if they would bring pillows and blankets from the bedding department .

8. August 23: When a clerk asked if they could help him, he began crying and screamed, 'Why can' t you people just leave me alone ?'

9. September 4: Looked right into the security camera and used it as a mirror while he picked his nose.

10. September 10: While handling guns in the hunting department , he asked the clerk where the antidepressants were.

11. October 3: Darted around the store suspiciously while loudly humming the ' Mission Impossible ' theme .

12. October 6: In the auto department , he practiced his ' Madonna look' by using different sizes of funnels.

13. October 18: Hid in a clothing rack and when people browsed through, yelled ' PICK ME! PICK ME!'

14. October 21: When an announcement came over the loud speaker, he assumed a fetal position and screamed 'OH NO! IT'S THOSE VOICE S AGAIN !'

And last, but not least .

15. October 23: Went into a fitting room, shut the door, waited awhile, then yelled very loudly, ' Hey! There 's no toilet paper in here! '

Happy Birthdays

2008-12-03T12:51:00.002-06:00

I got hooked up with a local Moms of Twins group while I was pregnant with the girls. They held monthly meetings down at the hospital. I went a few times before I had the girls, watching in amazement as all these little people, some who looked exactly alike and some who didn't or weren't even the same sex, crawled all over their mamas while we snacked and chatted. Could I really do this?

With my first child, I waited tables and bartended until 3 days before I gave birth. With the twins, I only gained about 30 pounds, but I was terribly sick for nearly the entire pregnancy. I had high blood pressure starting at 27 weeks, I ended up on bedrest at 30 weeks, I was admitted to the hospital twice from my doctors office, I couldn't eat anything except ice pops in plastic wrappers for the last 2 weeks of my pregnancy without throwing up. I was miserable.

One Friday afternoon around 4:30 I had this awful headache that would not go away. I had been warned about this being a side effect of HBP. I called my doctors office and asked how long I should wait after taking several Tylenol to see if the headache went away. It had already been 2 hours. I talked to the nurse, I was put on hold, I was told to come on to the hospital. I didn't want to go again. I didn't want to be 'observed'. I wanted to sleep and not hurt. I asked her if I could wait for my husband to come home, it would just be another hour or so. I swear I will go as soon as he gets home. I have a 4 year old, I can't just take myself and her to the hospital.

I called dear husband, I warned him we had to go. We arrived at the hospital around 6pm. I was poked, prodded, blood drawn, blood pressure taken, peed in the cup, monitored, IV ran, and fed. Husband rented a movie, my father-in-law took my oldest. We settled in. About 3am I woke up and had to use the restroom. As I was getting out of bed, I felt the warm gush of fluid run down my leg. I called the nurse. My water broke. I woke up husband. My doctor was called. My girls are fraternal and were in seperate sacs, but one of them was mercifully ready to be born.

The ultrasound technician came and did a quick scan. Both babies heads were down, all was well. The anesthesiologist came in and ran an epidural, just in case we had to do an emergency ceserean, and because having twins is tough. About 8:30 my doctor arrived. I was dilated to 6. At 9:15 the nurse checked again, we were ready to go. I was wheeled to the operating room as a precaution. I couldn't focus but I was trying to follow directions. There were so many people: each baby had 4 nurses, I had 4 nurses, the doctor, anesthesiologist, his assistant, and 3 emergency room nurses in case we had a problem.

The first baby, Child #2, came right along. I tried to crane my neck to watch the nurses. I tried to hear her cry and couldn't. I kept asking my husband if she was okay. The nurses kept asking me to pay attention, there was still one more. One nurse climbed up on a stepstool and started smashing my stomach, trying to pin down the baby still inside. Child #3 was being difficult, trying to turn around. The nurse shoved her in the right direction as hard as she could. I was thankful for the epidural. Unfortunately for this one, she was face up instead of face down. Babies don't fit well that way, and she ended up with a huge bruised forehead.

As soon as I saw her being taken to the warming bed to be cleaned up everything went black. I don't remember the next 3 days. What I do know is that I started having seizures. My blood pressure was too high. I was given all sorts of medicines to try to help. I couldn't have visitors, I couldn't have lights on, I couldn't have tv. The nurses told my husband it was serious. I needed to remain calm. My HBP was life-threatening. Truth is, I didn't have a clue where I was. A few times my husband brought the babies to me. I was delirious and swore he kept bringing me the same one. I wanted to know what happened to the other one. There are pictures and video dear husband took of the babies with me during those days that I don't remember him taking.

Once the fog cleared and the medicine kicked in things got much better. I was sore, but the babies were fine less the bruised forehead. We all went home a few days later. I was scared to death of them. So tiny. They needed to eat every 2 hours and it took an hour for me to feed them both. I didn't sleep more than 30 minutes at a time for the next 2 months. Everything I did was in a fog. Eventually it got better. They slept more, I slept more, they ate real food, I ventured out of the house with them. I went back to my Moms of Twins meetings. They held babies, brought food, offered encouragement. I would not have made it without them.

Yesterday, those tiny little babies turned 8 years old. When I brought them home I would never have imagined we would make it this far. I watched those women with older twins, triplets & quads and marveled at how big their children seemed, and I couldn't imagine that I would ever be the one with the toddlers offering advice on breastfeeding and starting table food. Or the one with Kindergartners offering advice on potty training. We fed, we napped, we potty trained, we played, we swam, we went to school- all the milestones I couldn't imagine. I look at them now and can't believe we did it. They are beautiful, smart little girls. They made it. And so did I.

I Need Help....

2008-12-01T09:04:00.003-06:00

No, get your mind out of the gutter... not that kind of help. My prozac is working quite nicely, thanks. Well, honestly, I'm not taking prozac anymore, but thats beside the point.

What I really need help with is Christmas. Specifically.... for my husband. What do I get him? Here is how the conversation went:

Me: How much are we spending on each other for Christmas?
Him: Hhhmmmm.... $300?
Me: Okay, what would you like?
Him: Nothing. You know if I want something I usually just get it.
Me: So, can you explain how I am supposed to spend $300 on 'nothing'?
Him: Unlike you, I don't require presents... just don't worry about it.

WTF?!?! So, I am supposed to spend $300, but have no idea on what. I realize you all don't really know my husband, but I need help. I'm taking all ideas on what to get him.

In exchange, here are the lists that 3 of my kids made for me, in case you need some kid ideas: Child #4 is a 5 year old boy, and children #2 & #3 are twin girls that will be 8 tomorrow!!!

Here is exactly what they wrote (spelling & grammer included)....

Child #2: My name is 'Child #2' and I want a Baby Alive, Nintendo DS, a scooter, TV in my room a miny bratz tv, and a fur real friends and can it be a horse. I want a desk and some candy and a little fluffy chair and a blanket and a matching pillow, and a pet dog and can it be a puppy. I want a webkinz, a selphon, radiow, and some bratz tene shoes, and some cookies.

Child #3: Dear Santa, I want a webkinz and a guitar and a big lollipop and a fur real friend horse and a celphone and a Nintendo D.S. and a T.V. in my room and a Wii and a radio and a slide for my bunkbed and a P.S.P. and a necklace and a ring and a yo-yo and a jingle bell to see if I beleive in christmas and a baby alove with the toilet like on the T.V. From: 'Child #3'

Child #4: Hi my name is 'Child #4' and I want a bike and a DS, a celphone raidow and a monkey, but not a real one, and a pensel box and some new race car shoes, and some candy.

Friday Fragments

2008-11-28T08:42:00.003-06:00

It is Friday, right? Yes, I think so. And good thing since I can't form coherent thoughts yet.

Kids.... have spent the night with grandmothers the past 2 nights. It is so nice to wake up in the morning without someone wedging me out of my own bed, not to have to hear Playstation Justice League at full volume at 5:30am, not to have to find milk and cereal spilled all over the kitchen. I even get to watch the news while having my coffee, instead of cartoons.

Thanksgiving... was good. We all went to my mother-in-laws. I am thankful she is wonderful. WE had a good dinner, the kids played outside, upstairs, downstairs. Even our dog went and had a good time. As a side note, I forgot to medicate my ADHD child #4 so he was balls to the wall full force all day long. I am thankful he didn't get hurt.

Barry Manilow.... is on my tv? Barry is the featured singer this morning on the Today Show. For whatever reason I think this is really funny, maybe because he is singing 80's hits- Islands in the Stream...that is what we are.... Usually they have some hip singer... Barry? I think I have an 8-track of his.

School.... a new class has started. Actually 2 classes. So far Federal Courts is a LOT of reading. There is also a weekly quiz. And I haven't even read for Environmental Law yet...

Sayings.... I heard a good one this week about politics. "If good people don't get involved, bad people will". True that. Sign me up.

Child #1... is going on a cruise to South America with her grandmother for Christmas. They aren't going until early January, but that is her Christmas gift. She also needs a fancy dress for a school dance. The school dance also requires her to have a date. She is considering going with her best guy friend, and I am totally good with that. But not good with the dance idea... she is getting big. I am not old enough to have a child going to high school next year.

Home.... I have the house to myself for the majority of the day. Husband is at work today and will be picking up children on his way home this afternoon. He won't work a full day, but that still gives me nearly a whole day home alone. This is a rare treat. While I would love to read blogs and play all day, I have work to do. Cleaning before Christmas decorations go up, and reading and quizzes to be done.

Thankful.... I am thankful for all of you who are reading this. I really never expected anyone to read any of this, it was mostly for my own sanity. But I have been pleasantly surprised and I enjoy your comments, suggestions, and stories. Thank you all for being here.

Free at Last...

2008-11-24T21:00:00.005-06:00

Well, I'm not really free... but my kids are. I recently learned that my parenting style is considered "Free-Range". That would be the opposite of "Helicopter". Its the difference between hovering over your children and allowing them freedom without constant supervision. As some of you may realize by now I have 5 children. The oldest is 12 nearly 13, and the youngest just turned 4. If I tried to watch them all at all times I'd either have to tie them together or have x-ray vision to see through walls. It would be impossible!

At age 7 I walked to school alone, stayed home alone after school, and rode my bike alone to the donut shop on Saturdays. When I was 12 I took the bus to the mall for the day or downtown to hang around the history museums. By the time I was 14 or 15 I rode my bike with my backpack of overnight clothes nearly 30 miles down country roads to my grandparents house- in an entirely different state!!! So, ever since I heard all the fuss on the Today Show about Lenore over at Free Range Kids, and how she let her 9 year old ride the subway home alone, I've been stalking.... ummm... following her blog. She has some great ideas. And I especially enjoy the comments from other parents. If you have children, no matter if you are helicopter or free-range, you should check her out. She isn't nearly as drastic as everyone makes her out to be. She was recently on the Dr. Phil show, and they are re-airing that episode on Thanksgiving Day- which may be the perfect time to watch because we all know the kids are going to be running around unsupervised with their cousins while the adults drink spiked eggnog so they don't maime or injure their in-laws.

So... along with my kids being free from my constant supervision, they will also be free from school after tomorrow. Until next week. I love holidays, but why do they have to cancel school? Oh, yeah... so that Vodka Mom over at I Need a Martini Mom can get a break and have some vodka martinis too. God bless you for your service to our children... your martinis are well deserved. (By the way, I tried some martinis made with blueberry vodka and they taste like blueberry muffins... dangerous stuff)Also, I am feeling pretty free. And No... I didn't confront friend's jackass husband. I will lie in wait and suprise him later. I actually got more awards!!! From Tova Darling... who has a perfectly evil mother-in-law (if you thought yours was bad check this one out!). She also has a secret identity since her name is not really Tova or Darling. She actually has a journalism degree, and felt it fit to bestow upon me the following awards:

The Superior Scribbler Award, which you can read about here....

She also bestowed upon me this award....Which translates as "This blog invests and believes in proximity" (meaning, that blogging makes us 'close'-being close through proxy). Or, if as Tova Darling believes, it translates however you like... then I think mine translates as "You are the hottest mother of 5 children and your brain power and ability in law school is freakin amazing"..... at least thats what I'm pretending it says...

And last she gave me this one of Marie Antionette...

Which is a really beautiful picture. MA was married at age 14 and later executed by her husband. It reminds me to tell you all that if you have not seen The Other Boleyn Girl, you should watch it. Mental Note: do not watch with small children- there are some fairly vivid sexually intimate scenes... and Eric Bana is pretty hot.

Some People are So Rude

2008-11-23T15:07:00.003-06:00

To begin, let me apologize for my lack of comments lately, but I promise I will get all caught up on reading in the next few days. I actually worked on Friday, as in went to a real workplace outside of my home.... I know, I know, weird. Then Friday night I went out with a few friends. Ever since Friday night I have been puzzling over how some people can be so rude.

A friend of mine from work and I decided we would call a couple other girls and go out to a local bar we like to go to on Friday's for karaoke. We had also discussed the possibility of running over to our local gay bar for an hour or so to see a friend of mine that bartends there. My husband had a long day and he didn't want to go. Her husband had been flying back across country all day after being out of town on work all week. He said he wasn't sure if he wanted to go or not. As background- we have gone on vacations with this couple for the last couple years, and go out with them on weekends or hang out at their house pretty regularly. Another friend wanted to go, and her husband may come with her. We all get to the bar around 7:30pm. Myself, my friend, our other friend and her husband, and another couple- we all eat and have a beer. Karaoke starts and we decide it might be a good time to run over to see my buddy at the gay bar. Obviously (although not necessarily so), my bartending friend is a gay guy. He is also my study partner at school. I am friends with him, his boyfriend, and about 10 of their other friends. A bunch of great guys.

So my friend calls her husband to see if he is in fact going to come out or not- so that he doesn't show up at one bar just as we have run over to another one. She tells him what the plan is. That is when he goes ballistic. For the next 20 minutes he is screaming at her on the phone. He was not only disparaging her- calling her all sorts of names and telling her she was being irresponsible. He was also being extremely rude and disrespectful to gays in general. She held the phone for me to listen during part of his tirade and it was all I could do to keep my mouth shut. Now, if you don't like gays, so be it. But name calling is really childish. And just an FYI- gay bars are not a den of iniquity with guys all over each other while straight women hang all over them wishing they could get in on the action. Our gay bar anyway, looks like any other bar- except perhaps that it has a disproportionate amount of attractive men sitting around.

At any rate, they argued and the entire time he was driving over to check and see if we were really at the karaoke bar. Then he asks my friend if my husband knows we are planning on going to the gay bar. She says he does indeed. Her husband says, "we'll see about that", hangs up, and proceeds to call my husband! Which my husband tells him that he knows and could care less. Really- is a woman safer in a karaoke bar full of drunk straight guys, or a upscale bar full of gay guys? hmmmm..... At this point I am pretty pissed that he called my husband anyway, because it isn't like I needed his permission to go to the gay bar, although I did tell him I would likely be going there out of married courtesy. I mean WTF?!?! You actually called my husband to ask if I had permission? Are you freakin kidding me?!?!

Friend then asked her husband if he called my husband. He says he did. She asks what did my husband tell him. He says, "well I'm not going to tell you all what he thinks about it.." Insinuating that my husband actually had an opinion that I shouldn't be going. Now I am even more pissed because I had just gotten off the phone with my husband and he relayed a brief rundown of the conversation. Basically the "I don't care if she wants to go there, but I don't want to go, and I hope she doesn't spend too much money". To keep myself out of trouble and not make things worse, I went back inside the karaoke bar and waited for them to finish up their argument. Had I said anything it would have gotten really ugly. Partly because I had heard all his crappy remarks about gays and then for him to call my husband and say what he said... oh, it would have been really ugly.

So my friend tells him that if he will go back home, she will stay at karaoke bar. Fine with me. Her choice. I can be happy either way. Do I think its ridiculous? Sure. Do I think he is jackass? Yep. Do I want to ever hang out with him again? Not so much. Do I want to tell him exactly what I think of his bigoted filthy mouth? you bet. Would it do me any good? It might make me feel better, but I'm pretty sure it wouldn't change his closed-mind. Do I stick up for my friends who are gay and tell him his attitude is rude and hateful and I refuse to go anywhere with him? Maybe I need to. So.... I ask all of you.... what would you do if you were me?

The Final Final Exam

2008-11-19T08:25:00.005-06:00

This post is written in the most PC way possible. I mean absolutely no disrespect to either my beloved institute of higher learning, nor the knowledgeable professor to whom this refers. All incidents were a result of an act of God by which none can or will be held responsible.

Last Wednesday our exam was postponed because our dear professor could not access it from his work computer due to a power outage. The power outage was caused by our local power company in response to a gas leak in the downtown area. Power was cut off the entire day from a 10 block radius in the center of downtown so as not to spark some explosion. He did not feel it would be possible for him to bring his work computer to a location with power in order to print out the exam. When he realized at 10am that he would not be able to administer the exam, he did not feel he could do us justice by just writing a new exam in the following 8 hours so that we could have taken it anyway. Last week I was so frustrated I could not post about it, because it would not have been very PC. It would have been this...
and our professor would have understood it completely and perhaps been proud that I had used it in an appropriate context. (for you other law-geeks out there, you now know the topic of my exam)

So.... It was rescheduled for this evening. I will not be as prepared as I was last week. I do not have anyone to watch child #5 for me today so I can go to the school early and immerse myself in review. I believe my grade will suffer. Last week many of us called the school to express our dissatisfaction with this situation. Many of my classmates had travel plans, plane tickets, or had taken a day off work to prepare themselves like good accountable students would. We can not do that again this week. Many requests were made for a take-home style exam. No messages were returned. The exam will proceed as scheduled. This is the last exam of my round of final exams. I will overcome.

Are you Fur Real?

2008-11-18T08:37:00.004-06:00

Eudea-Mamia posted a lovely reminder this morning about the beauty of Christmas and little children. The tinsel, twinkling lights, trees and beautiful ornaments that bring out the joy and amazement on the faces of our children. Who knew so much beauty could be had in a Super Target? However, there is a dark side to Christmas....

Commercials. It seems like every year for the ever-longer months of the Christmas season the retail world is bombarding our children with all the things they absolutely must have from Santa. Last night we were watching some television program, and each commercial break I was harassed with "I want that", "Santa needs to bring me this", "why do brothers get all the good stuff and we get clothes?".... you get the idea.

Well, to begin with, I have subliminally spoken with dear ol' Santa and he is bringing each child #1-4 one of these... in their favorite color so as to avoid confusion.

We do not need one of these...

We have a dog. A real one. Play with her. She is no fun you say? Well, there are children out there begging for a real dog and all they will get is one of these Fur Real Friends. Be thankful your Mama loves you enough to get you the real deal.... I mean WTF? I got you a For Real Dog. Is she chopped liver?

Neither do we need any of these....

Baby Alive? I have 5 kids, just the thought of more babies make me cringe, especially ones that pretend to be alive. Besides, what do you think you have younger brothers for? Play with them.

Its a no win situation in the end. While the gifts are cool, there will always be something missing. Something Santa forgot. Or more accurately something Santa refused to buy. And the dollar amount of the gifts has nothing to do with the joy of Christmas morning- its all about the size of the pile. I could give my kids each a $1000 piece of jewelry and it wouldn't be near as cool as a $20 huge ass bouncy ball. In their defense, I may have provoked that part, I mean really, who doesn't like to see a huge pile of stuff with their name on it? To make up for the relatively small size of the DS, I convinced Santa to bring new bikes as well. Hopefully between those 2 things and the rest of the little stuff like coloring books, crayons, underwear, a few shirts, and maybe some play-doh or a slinky thrown in, this year Santa will remain in their good graces as the guy with all the goods.

I Knew It!

2008-11-17T11:03:00.002-06:00

I have had the nagging feeling for over a month now that there was something I needed to do. I couldn't place it though. I had talked to nearly every friend lately, my parents, my brother. I have listed all the band practices, holiday parties, snack days, and letter of the day on the calender. What on earth could I be forgetting?

Then I was cleaning out my car this weekend. I had taken 2 bags of clothes to Goodwill on Sunday. Bags that had been in my trunk for 3 months (sshhhh... don't tell my husband, he thought they were already gone). I drug a couple pair of my shoes out of the backseat, and a black suit I had taken to IN back in May for the funeral of my best friends mom. Buried beneath the junk....

The booklet and CD of my beautiful 5 year old boys pictures! I had taken him to have his special Kindergarten pictures made back in August. I totally forgot! I had made each of the girls a special smocked or pleated dress that they had fancy pictures made in, and I had dug out the outfit my husband wore in his special picture when he was 5 for my son to wear. He looked absolutely adorable. She even lets the kids bring their favorite thing and makes some less formal pictures with their special item. He picked the shotgun he got from his namesake grandfather who passed away the month before. This blessed photographer didn't flinch when I told her that was what he wanted to bring. She said it would be great and she would bring out the horse saddle and cowboy hat for him. Bless her heart- she is wonderful!

But then after a few days of showing off my beautiful child #4, I threw them in the back of the car in a rush and hadn't thought much of them since. I haven't ordered any, I haven't done anything. I showed them around when I first got the proofs, but after that- nada! So I made a note on my handy dandy calender to call this wonderful photographer, apologize profusely, and hope that I can still order the pictures.

Wish me luck

Helluva Week

2008-11-16T19:20:00.005-06:00

I totally intended on doing this post Friday as part of Friday Fragments, however... its been one heck of a week. I've been busy, sidetracked at every turn, and distracted. Here goes:

- My dad called on Thursday and has been laid off his job. He lives in IN and the economy there is worse than it is here, and chances are slim he will find something. He is thinking of moving closer to me, so close in fact that he may very well be living in my spare bedroom. The good news about that is, as former military he is super duper clean. And he would probably clean my house because it would drive him crazy.

- My last final exam was supposed to be on Wednesday. I got Child #5 dropped off with my husband, and got over to the school for a few hours of study and down time before the exam began. And about that time, they canceled the exam. Actually, postponed it- to this coming Wednesday. I appreciate the extra study time, but I was ready for the hell to be over.

- Friday night I was supposed to go celebrate the end of exams with some friends. Since exams weren't over I was torn. I ended up going anyway, but it was hard to really have a good time
when I felt guilty for being there instead of home studying. However, watching really bad karaoke is always good to take your mind off whats bothering you.

- Some good news- my kids actually let me sleep in until 9am on both Saturday and Sunday mornings. I haven't slept in that late in a very very long time. I usually am up at 5:30 to start getting the kids ready for school, and I didn't even realize I could sleep so late.

- A friend of mine from school saw one of our professors on Thursday at a CLE class and was told he turned in our grades. He said the spread was 8 A's, 1 D, and the rest in between. The grades should be posted tomorrow. Please, sweet baby Jesus, let me have an A.

-Child #2 has been sick all day today. My twins (#2 & #3) had a friend spend the night Saturday night. Then Sunday morning #2 woke up not feeling well. Her stomach has been hurting all day, a slight fever, we've had the bowl nearby. One nice thing did come out of it- I was getting ready to leave and run errands this morning and she asked me "but who will take care of me while you are gone?" I told her Daddy was staying with her. Her lip quivered and she said, "but what if he doesn't know what to do?" I reassured her I told Daddy exactly what to do. At least I know I am needed.

There is probably more that has happened, but I have purged it from my mind already. Making room for exam materials up there. Tonight, after the kids get in bed, I am getting in the hot tub for a well deserved relaxing soak. Maybe my husband will quiz me with my notecards for the exam while we're at it...

Michael Jackson, Scott Peterson, and... the Dhaliwals

2008-11-13T21:04:00.008-06:00

I know what you are thinking... who the heck are the Dhaliwals? And what do they have in common with Michael Jackson and Scott Peterson? Well the Dhaliwal brothers, Amritpal and Kulbir, are the young men from San Jose who were attacked last year by the 243 pound tiger, Tatiana, who escaped from her enclosure at the San Francisco zoo. (Or San Fran-Sicko if you listen to Michael Savage). It seems the brothers have finally retained an attorney, Mark Geragos. The same attorney who swore that Jacko was a 'perfectly normal human being' and Scott Peterson was 'an innocent man'. Yeah, I can take him seriously.

The brothers and a friend were visiting the zoo last year when the tiger escaped, attacking the brothers and killing their friend. At the time, word on the street was that the group of young men taunted the tiger into attacking. Now the young men, ages 20 and 24, have filed a lawsuit in federal court against the city, zoo and others, claiming slander and civil rights violations. They are seeking unspecified damages. I can't imagine why folks would think these young men taunted the tiger... maybe there were witnesses? Or maybe its because teenage and young men don't routinely hang around at zoos? I mean really, when was the last time you saw a group of young men just out enjoying the wildlife....
"look look! a ring-tailed lemur! way cool..."
"oh next we just must go over to the reptile house!"
"yeah, but I can't wait to see that new prarie dog exhibit!"
"oh, come on! the tiger exhibit is the best- remember when that one ate Siegfried?"
"no dude, I thought he ate Roy..."
"omg who cares... lets check them out, maybe they've got the white ones too"
Kulbir Dhaliwal contends his federal civil rights were violated because he was deprived the use of his BMW M3, the car the three took to the zoo. Police impounded the car during their investigation. (Aww... bless his heart, they took his sweet ride).

The brothers also contend city officials along with Sam Singer, a crisis management spokesman for the zoo engaged in a smear campaign to suggest the young men were disreputable and had taunted the tiger before the escape. Disreputable? Amritpal Dhaliwal was sentenced in August to 16 months in state prison on a probation violation in Santa Clara County, and appeared this week in Alameda County Superior Court charged with shoplifting video game equipment from three Target stores. Sounds like an upstanding young man if you ask me....

I'm not judging though. Innocent until proven guilty and all that. Besides, the brothers contend they were permanently scarred by the attacks and the city and zoo were negligent in keeping Tatiana in an enclosure that had walls lower that what is recommended by the Association of Zoos and Aquariums. They also say the zoo ignored workers' warnings about the wall height and that Kulbir Dhaliwal wasn't attacked until after an employee refused to allow him into the safety of a zoo cafe. (Hindsight is 20/20 isn't it? Maybe they should have consulted with Roy). In their defense, City Attorney Dennis Herrera's office has said the city is not liable and directed the brothers to file a claim with the San Francisco Zoological Society, the nonprofit that operates the zoo. Way to 'pass the buck'.

I'm hoping they show this trial on CourtTv. The details you hear at trial are never the ones printed in the paper. I wouldn't count my chickens (or tiger cubs) before they hatch if I were either side.

Widow's Tragic Death

2008-11-12T08:42:00.004-06:00

Maybe she took his remote one too many times.
Maybe she nagged.
Maybe she expected him to clean the toilets.
Maybe she was a bad cook.
Or maybe she didn't cook at all.

On the other hand, maybe she was his life.
Maybe he couldn't go on to the other side without her.
Maybe he knew she couldn't go on without him.
Maybe he just couldn't bear to leave her alone.

Any way about it, I'm wondering what sort of relationship this woman had with her husband resulting in this sort of divine intervention. Mr. Coimbra passed away at the age of 76 as a result of a heart attack he suffered while at a dance with his wife, age 67. The next day, while on the way to the funeral, the hearse containing Mr. Coimbra in the rear and his wife in the front seat, was struck by another vehicle causing the casket to fly forward and strike his wife in the head killing her.

The poor family. I wonder what they are all thinking now.

I know what I'm thinking. Don't ever ride in the front seat of a hearse.

Thank a Veteran

2008-11-11T13:08:00.004-06:00

Today is Veterans Day, just in case you wondered why so many people didn't go to work today, or why you didn't go to work today. Originally called Armistice Day, it is now known as Veterans Day. A day to honor all veterans and armed service members for their sacrifices. For all the faults of the military, it has produced some wonderful soldiers who take protecting our country and freedoms very seriously.

Beyond just thanking all the former and current service men AND women out there, I want to give a special shout out to:

1) MY DADDY. My daddy signed up for the army during the Vietnam War. Daddy and his 2 best friends signed up together right out of high school. Now honestly, he did this because he had been less than studious in high school and couldn't afford college without the GI Bill, but still. He signed up, he served all over the world, he devoted years of his life to the army- heck, I was even born in a military hospital in Germany for pete's sake! So thanks Daddy, for your service.

2) MY BROTHER-IN-LAW. My brother in law also comes from a military family, his daddy and granddaddy all served in the army. He is currently deployed and will be returning early next year. Every time I hear a story about progress being made in the war, my heart just beams with pride for him. He has won many awards for his brave conduct, including a Bronze Star and a Purple Heart for being combat wounded. He is one tough guy. Thanks, love and big kisses from all of us!

3) MY COUSIN. Who is also preparing to deploy again for the 3rd time. He joined the army right after getting his GED and has spent time all over the US, Korea, Iraq, and Afghanistan. Who would have thought some kid from IN could do so much traveling? The army has been a wonderful place for him and taught him lots of things- he is responsible, caring, kind, smart, and I am proud to be his cousin. Much love for you!

4) MY ANCESTORS. I have ancestors who fought in the Civil War, Revolutionary War, World Wars I and II, and all the little skirmishes in between. When my great-great granddaddy was 15 and working in the fields with his daddy they were approached about serving in the MI Infantry in the Civil War. He lied about his age and said he was 18 so he could go. They had one horse between them, and his daddy told him to take it and go into the Calvary because it would be safer for him. They both served in many battles. At the end of the war my great-great-granddaddy came back home to MI to take care of his mama and younger siblings. His daddy died from wounds received in battle at a camp in Arkansas. Until about 5 years ago, no one was even sure where he had been buried. My brother finally found him- at the National Veterans Cemetery in Little Rock, AR. He even made a road trip to visit the grave. I had tears just thinking that finally after 140 years someone in our family had found him to pay respects. He was buried alone, without family by his side. I imagine he is thankful he gave the horse to his son, because from that son he has many proud young men and women descendants who have also faithfully served our country. Thanks and love to each and every one of my ancestors- especially those who made the ultimate form of sacrifice.

I know that many people don't agree with the war, want the soldiers home, want this to be over... but please, know that those soldiers are doing a wonderful job and are proud of what they are doing. They are protecting our own soil and our children and families. If you see one... thank him or her.

This is What I Love About Sundays

2008-11-09T20:16:00.005-06:00

I left my house last night after dinner to go and study and spend the night at my mother-in-laws house and really get some quality work time in. It was productive, but after 24 hours of reviewing I was spent. I packed it up and started home. When I got home, I found this....

I love fires. They make you feel all warm inside, and are wonderful for reading and thinking. My dear husband not only watched the children while I studied... he made a fire.

I went in search of him to thank him and see about dinner. That is when I found this.

Our neighbor, who regularly hunts on our land, killed this buck this afternoon. Husband was outside helping Neighbor, and Child #4 was helping husband (see above). In exchange for hunting privileges, he shares the meat. You may not believe me, but deer meat in chili tastes the same as ground beef. So, while I sit here enjoying my fire and your new posts, Husband is outside helping clean the deer so we can save money and not buy so much meat at the grocery. What a trooper.

Giving Lawyers a Bad Name

2008-11-08T09:56:00.006-06:00

As a law student, I am sometimes amazed at the lawsuits that get filed. The one that always springs to mind is the one filed by the woman scalded by hot coffee at McDonalds. Really? You didn't think your coffee was going to be hot? You're right, I like my coffee lukewarm... just in case. Anyway, I came across this story this morning and once again realized why so many people hate lawyers.
Now don't get me wrong. I feel for people who have been injured, had their property injured, have crimes committed against them, had someone screw them over in a contract, you get the idea. But this guy? Not so much.

Jerry Glenn Hayes of Boise is suing the state of Idaho as well as Ada County for $3 million claiming it failed to educate him about the West Nile virus.

"Ada County and several other government state agencies have been named in a lawsuit filed by a gentleman who claims not enough was done to protect him during the 2006 West Nile virus outbreak," said Laura Wylde, public information specialist for Ada County.

Oh, where do you even start with this? Where is Mr. Hayes sense of personal responsibility? I realize that contracting West Nile is life-threatening, and it must really suck to have it. But he really wants to blame it on the state and county for lack of education?

And the lawyer... oh the lawyer. Please, please file something that makes the rest of us look like ambulance chasing scum of the earth. Can we set a worse precedent by filing suits for these people? Whats next? Suing the county over not warning you that remaining in the sun for hours will cause sunburns and potential skin cancer? Shall I sue the police department for failing to stop you for speeding because, had you only known, you would not have driven wrecklessly and crashed your car? The first rule of remedies is to restore the plaintiff to the position he would have been in, but for the wrong of the defendant. Hear that lawyers? But for the wrong. I realize that is a very broad statement, but we are (or will be) lawyers for goodness sakes. After 3 or 4 grueling years of law school do we lose all common sense?

The hearing on this case is scheduled for next week.

For the Fairness Doctrine

2008-11-07T09:28:00.006-06:00

Although the Fairness Doctrine has not been reinstituted as of yet, I wanted to go ahead and post my brother's opinion on the recent election. Since we communicate via email, I am just going to copy and paste his words, lest I leave out some important detail. I re-read this all before I copied it, and I still don't agree with him. I actually was really tempted to tear apart his email piece by piece with facts & figures (like the fact that we don't have employer based healthcare either, but we still have insurance or that tax refunds are actually just allowing the gov't to use your money interest free and you should change your withholding so you get to keep more each check and invest it). In fact, I am not even sure we are really related anymore. Just kidding! I think age has a lot to do with our differing opinions. After all, when I was young I voted for Clinton because I thought he was going to change things. I love my brother's idealist views on things. Especially his view on inadequate participation in the system. Amen to that! And if you happen to be an Obama supporter, I'd love to hear your thoughts as well. So, in the interest of fairness....

Although I understand your sentiment that you don't like having your money taken for someone else who is not working, I might suggest that the majority of your money that's being taken will go toward a tax cut for working Americans and to pay for health care initiatives. My tax refund will increase, and I'm hardly not working; the health care plan also provides for folks who can't get employer-based healthcare (again like me). I think if you crunched the numbers, you'd see that welfare, food stamps, WIC, and other 'handouts' form a miniscule amount of the federal tax bill.

I do agree with you on the notion that now a certain race or color will be 'in charge'. That possibility has always concerned me as an Obama supporter, but I don't think you can attribute it to Obama just as it's difficult to attribute to McCain the shouting at Palin rallies to kill Obama.

The conservative ideology of relying on civic duty often doesn't pan out well when it's aligned with the conservative ideology of 'work hard, keep what you earn' capitalism. After all, why engage in your civic duty to help the less fortunate when your ideological goal is to make as much money as possible? Government's job is to be the civic duty and to make sure everyone is doing their civic duty; that's why comments such as 'paying taxes isn't patriotic' bother me so much. Palin was wrong to assert that, because it denies the social contract.

I don't disagree that government could be more efficient. We should not, however, throw out the baby with the bathwater. Falling prey to the argument that we must denude government of its functions because it is inefficient amounts in a separation of government from its basis of power in the people. Doing so only makes the problem worse by convincing us we must fight against government waste from the outside rather than take the attitude that government waste is a symptom of inadequate participation in the system.

I also might point out that, unfortunately, churches and charities cannot make up the difference sometimes. They often are stretched to the breaking point by economic downturns, and even in good times certain areas lack charitable assistance. While we all might like to think that charity can and will provide a floor for the poverty-stricken, the reality is not the case. I myself would love it if churches could pay the rent for everyone and if charities could make sure every student I teach has enough food to eat. But the reality, again, is not the case. The government, as a collective of individuals, can be relied upon to provide that floor.

Random Political Thoughts

2008-11-06T11:42:00.018-06:00

As a little Prologue, my only brother is 12 years younger than I am. I grew up in Northern Indiana very near the Michigan state line. He grew up mostly in middle Tennessee. I went to a small college in Indiana, he went to a small college in northwest Missouri. He is 22 and this is his first year teaching school in St. Louis. If you've read my previous posts, you probably know that I voted for McCain along with the majority of TN residents. He not only voted for Obama, he donated to his campaign and went door to door for him (Tena you may have seen him at your door?). After some initial gloating on his part, we had a bit of a philosophical discussion on politics and civic duty. Below are some thoughts I shared with my brother the morning after the election...

I don't have a problem with Obama on immigration, education, and several other things. I don't think its possible to deport 12-20 million illegal immigrants, and I believe if they are working and not in trouble we ought to give them a path to citizenship. We should secure the borders, but securing the borders and giving paths to citizenship are not mutually exclusive. I disagree with him on taking from the "rich" to give to the "poor". I disagree with his taxes on small business during this economic downturn. I don't have a solution, but I didn't run for President either.
My thoughts on social programs: I have a heart. I feel sorry for people who work hard and can't make ends meet. I've been there. I would like to see them receive help to make things better. But I don't believe that the government should be responsible for providing that help. The government, at all levels from local to federal, has a history of mismanaging money. The government takes $20 of my money to help others and wastes $15 of it on red tape and administrative costs. I would rather give my time and money directly to my neighbors, friends, and family that need help. Cut out the middleman. Make my $20 worth $20 in assistance. Obama talked last night about civic duty, and I think if people really heard what he said and really helped others around them, people they see on a daily basis, then we wouldn't need the government to intervene with assistance programs. Maybe because people here are more involved in religious organizations it is different. I know people here that the church has provided assistance with rent, utilities, food. That is the sort of civic duty and assistance that I am more than happy to support. I think the government assistance programs fuel a co-dependant relationship. People who need help depend more and more on the government and people who would be willing to help them through churches and other organizations become less and less willing to help them because they know that those people can get money through government programs. Its a vicious cycle that ends up taking a larger percentage from those who have and giving a lesser percentage to those who need it.

I think if Obama inspires change that is wonderful, so long as he doesn't dictate it. I think he is very intelligent and well spoken. NPR had a piece in which some whites offered their concern that the "they are in charge now" thing may get out of hand by some and that now the whites will have to step off the sidewalk and into the street to let them by. Barack and Michelle's law professor was also interviewed and said they are both intelligent and will do well, and also said that blacks can no longer claim any 2nd class citizen routine or fall back on "I'm black and deserve more" now that a black man is President- we are now officially equal, so get over the color issue.

After listening to McCain and Obama both speak last night I thought I could be on board with this. And I will certainly support my President and my Country. BUT, then I saw the freakin thugs (a very specific type of person, not necessarily related to a particular race) in Grant Park acting like now that Obama won they are in charge, and I'll admit I was a bit bothered. I don't get this same feeling from Obama, but I think some of the other blacks (like John Lewis from Atlanta) are feeling 'now its our turn to oppress the whitey'. Maybe its a different perspective living in the South, but thats the biggest thing besides the tax plan that bothers me. (At that point my brother even had the humility to admit that as an Obama supporter that thought had also crossed his mind).

I suppose for me, color makes no difference because I've never treated a black person as a second class citizen. Our own family is like the United Nations: my uncle is black, my cousins are biracial, another cousin married a Mexican immigrant, another married a Korean while stationed there in the army, and my own first husband and biological father of Oldest was a green card immigrant from Estonia in the former Soviet Union. I graduated from a high school where whites were a near minority. I do think some blacks will try to take advantage of this, but I would think and hope that Obama would make it clear that that sort of behavior is only magnifying something that should be a nonissue. The behavior yesterday of some Black Panther members at polling locations in PA, blocking entrances and telling white voters they won't be 'kept down by the man anymore', may be indicitive of how some will behave now that Obama has won. If I were black I would be just as embarassed by the 'now we are in charge' behavior as I personally am by the 'I won't ever support/vote for Obama because he's black' behavior of some whites. Racial equality is still a few years behind here in TN, and especially so in the rural areas. I remember in high school having a black girl cut me in the lunchline, and when I told her no cuts and moved up, she retorted with 'you owe me, get out of my way'. That behavior is the kind that only diminishes all the good things that have been accomplished. It may not happen in IN or MO anymore, but it certainly still happens here. If you fall back on feeling like you deserve something because of your history and the color of your skin, you are only perpetuating the stereotype that you are a second class citizen. I don't care if Obama is purple, I care how he is going to perform as President of the US.

I'm just hoping I don't have to plant a garden and keep money in shoeboxes under my bed to survive the next few years.

Wednesday: Wordless, Wordful, but not Wonderful

2008-11-05T07:45:00.003-06:00

I have a lot of really insightful thoughts I planned to share with you after our country elected Barack Obama as our new President. Unfortunately, that will have to wait until tomorrow. My final exam last night went pretty well, but that was the easy one. Tonight- the dreaded evidence. Rules within rules and hearsay within hearsay... the whole exam is 4 hours long. In honor of that, I leave you with this

VOTE!

2008-11-04T08:21:00.003-06:00

It amazes me how many people don't vote. Or only vote in presidential elections. Then those same people want to complain about how the 'government' did or didn't do something. Really? If you don't like it, maybe you should have educated yourself about the issues and voted?

Several things have come to mind about voting this year:

1) dead people really can vote. No? You don't think so? Well, when you early vote, then you die before the election, your vote still counts. Moral of the story.... if you are on your deathbed, vote absentee or vote early.

2) no matter what people tell you, they will still vote based on race. and it goes both ways. white people will NOT vote for Obama because he is black, and black people WILL vote for Obama because he is black. in my opinion, thats racism either way. don't vote race, vote issues.

3) the electoral collage is still a good system. how can that be? well, usually the popular vote and electoral college results will mesh pretty well. however, if we were only concerned with popular vote, what would stop the candidates from pushing hard in densely populated areas like NYC, LA, Miami and ignoring the voters in Minnesota, Montana, North Dakota, etc? We certainly don't want the entire country to be ruled by the big cities.

I look forward to this years election results. I am hoping for the best. Hoping that people realize how important this is and get out and vote after actually considering the issues facing our country. There are so many things to consider, much more than the generic terms of environment, war, economy, healthcare.... everything is interrelated. The backlash of policies enacted 10 years ago are just starting to rear their ugly heads. Think it through, be smart, and then Vote.

I've enjoyed this little saying I heard a few years back from a black pastor in Chicago, truer words were never spoken...
"The more you have to conserve, the more conservative you become."

Also, while you are at it, send me some good vibes, well wishes, prayers, whatever it is you do, that everything goes well for me tonight when I take the first of my final exams.

No Rest for the Weary

2008-11-02T21:26:00.009-06:00

Well, its down to the line now. McCain, Palin, Obama, Biden, and ME are all in that mode to make the most out of what little time we have left. My exams begin in less than 48 hours. I vary between moments of panic and moments of confidence. Last night at the Halloween party while everyone else was enjoying karaoke, I was pretending to listen while reciting the rules of evidence in my head. I spent the morning reviewing, took a little nap, and will be up into the wee hours of the morning hoping to solidify some morsel of knowledge that will make the difference between a B and an A. At times like this I begin to resent the people who make those lawyer jokes. You have no idea how hard this is. Sure, make fun of lawyers all you want, but when you need one dammit you will be grateful someone is willing to help bail your ass out of whatever you got yourself into. I've never been to med school, obviously, but I betcha this is just as hard and I don't hear people making jokes about doctors at the bottom of rivers. Its all fun and games until you need a will or estate plan, wreck your car because you didn't notice that stop sign, have you kid get picked up with a bag of weed, find out your spouse is cheating, or have a boss who sexually harasses you. I'm spending hours, weeks, years, of my time that could be well spent with my kids to figure out how to make sure your constitutional rights are protected and vindicated in a court of law. Bite me people who want to crack jokes. Then call another lawyer.

DISCLAIMER: the following paragraph is political in nature and probably not very nice... if you are sick of politics feel free to skip it....

Maybe I'm just tired and cranky, a little snappy. Or maybe I've been watching too much Fox news. Or driving through affluent neighborhoods where people jogged and rode their bikes to coffee shops scowling at my Suburban and lamenting the fact that I still use plastic grocery bags and don't recycle and compost my coffee grounds. I mean, after all, if Obama wins I may not even have time for being a lawyer. I'll be too busy growing my own food and tending to my solar panels so my kids and I can survive. After his plan bankrupts the coal industry and electric prices skyrocket, I don't get a tax cut under his plan, and he takes even more than the 50% I already pay in taxes so we can redistribute the wealth to those who can't or won't work, I may be better off staying home and living like the Amish. I especially hope that Obama can appoint some Supreme Court judges with empathy rather than ones that are willing to uphold the constitution and seperation of powers. Really, that would just round out the worthlessness of my future degree. On the other hand, if it won't be worth being a lawyer, maybe I can look into politics... that seems to be the way of the future- at least when we become socialist I can keep my stuff.

I guess, on Tuesday, when I begin taking finals and our country begins to elect a new leader, we will only begin to know what fate awaits us....

Friday Fragments

2008-10-31T07:58:00.007-05:00

In Honor of Tena over at My Therapy (more on her later), I stole (temporarily) her Friday Fragments headline because that is the story of my life today.

First off, let me say that whoever left the 3 adorable puppies at my house last night while I was out schmoozing at a presale kickoff party for a new condo development can come back and pick up those adorable little things. They are cute, I have fed them, but they will be taken to the animal shelter today. I have a dog already, and like her owner, she is old, tired, and doesn't want to deal with a puppy. I was terribly tempted to keep the cream colored one... but who am I kidding? I don't have time for house-training. I reread Sabrae's blog just to remind myself why I don't need a puppy. Thanks Sabrae for that smack upside the head.
UPDATE: I'm adding a picture. If you live near Nashville and want one, I might bring it to you. Limited time offer only.... or off to the pound they go.

Second, everyone was pleased with their costumes. All costumes fit with no additional work from me. That was awesome because working on that crap at 6a.m. would have given me a mental breakdown. Husband saw his costume, and while he doesn't want to show it, he is pretty pumped about his Elvis jumpsuit. I am still contemplating Priscilla's outfit. As a side note on the hair (and because none of you really know what I look like), I will mention that my hair is long, brown, really thick, and curly- I could just wake up in the morning and probably have something similar to the beehive I need, so I have been assured by numerous friends that fixing my hair will NOT be a problem. I'll take that as a compliment. I guess.

Third, I can hear those puppies outside whining. I will NOT feel sorry for them. I will NOT try to love them or keep them. Someone come get these damn things!!! (Really, you know you want one....)

Fourth, I have ladybugs on my ceiling. Specifically, on the ceiling in my boys bedroom. Which means the boys won't sleep in there because the bugs make noise and they are 'scary'. So, I am going to vaccum those little suckers off the ceiling with my Dyson and then figure out how they got in and seal off the access point. If you want to know more about ladybugs, Tena posted a lovely story with photos about it because it seems she is having the same problem.

Fifth, I was Boo'ed by Tena- remember her from somewhere up above? Well, she boo'ed me. Which doesn't mean I get any candy, or really anything tangible that I could enjoy. But I do get this awesome Halloween picture. I meant to get this little spot for Boo'ed up higher in my list, but I got sidetracked. At any rate, I hope I did her proud, cause after all she did get 5, count em, 5 linky loves from me! Take that! I am supposed to Boo'ed others, but because I have some random puppies and some ladybugs to vacuum, I will just Boo everyone who reads this. Ha!

Lastly, later today I will be slaving my children out to gather candy for me while I drink beer and/or wine, or wine coolers, or maybe just some vodka... I will follow them and encourage them to continue after they trip and fall in the dark, because we don't raise sissies and mama needs more candy! Seriously though, we are going to visit with Mr. & Mrs. Lipstick over at Lipstick at the Mailbox. Mr. Lipstick is conducting a tractor hayride with Mrs. Lipstick's tractor she loves. My oldest child is too good to go with us, so she is spending the night with a friend. Husband and I are not wearing our costumes because we are too lazy (give me a break, we have 5 kids and a party tomorrow).

HAPPY HALLOWEEN!

I Hate Costumes

2008-10-30T12:36:00.005-05:00

After stopping at 2 stores looking for costumes I am through with Halloween and everyone better like what they got. I know....I know.... I should have started shopping sooner you say. I would have had better selection, yada, yada, yada.
Whatever. I hate costumes. Expensive, poorly made, itchy, ill-fitting, pieces of crap. But I'll play along.
I took requests from the kids and here is what I got:

Child #1: God love her, she is going to wear one of my old halloween costumes. She isn't trick or treating, but she is going to a party. She just wants something comfortable. I have a nice black velvet robe and she can be a vampire or whatever that makes you wanna be. Like this but without the slits in it.

Child #2: Wizard. She wouldn't give me another option. Here is what she got.

Child #3: Penguin, Cat, Magician, Pirate, and... if she has to be... a princess. Here is what she got.

Child #4: Black Spiderman. This is my only option. I had a really cute Peter Pan outfit my sister gave to me that would fit him- but Peter Pan is a sissy and he will not be seen in that. So, he got the Black Spiderman, albeit without the built-in muscles, because, well... muscles cost $10 more and I really didn't care that much.

Child #5: A queen or cereal. Really, both answers were bad. When I asked he was eating Cherrios and I had just finished trying to convince the girls to wear the princess outfits they had from last year. He is going to be Peter Pan and like it.

Husband: Anything that does not require makeup. Or a wig. So... because he really loves Elvis, and he thinks Elvis is still alive, and in all my love for him I agreed to be married by an Elvis in Las Vegas.... He got this. Along with a red cape.

Now I just have to figure out what I am going to do. I tried on this outfit.

It barely covered my ass. If it looks short in the picture- it may as well be a shirt. I'm brave, but that would have been obscene.
My friend suggested I tease my hair into the ultimate beehive and dress up as Priscilla... I can probably go there, I just need a good 70's outfit.

If you all have any ideas- let me know! And quick!!!!

McCain Rally in NC and my adorable Niece...

2008-10-29T13:49:00.004-05:00

Yesterday my 7 week old adorable niece went to her first political rally in Fayetteville, NC (near Ft. Bragg). My sister-in-law and a friend waited in line for about 4 hours and ended up front row to hear from McCain and Palin. Little Rudy caught the attention of the press and is now famous the world over on Yahoo- perhaps because she is so freakin cute, or maybe it was her button. I'll let you decide for yourself....

Rudy Sanderlin, 7-weeks-old, is held high as Republican presidential candidate Sen. John McCain, R-Ariz., speaks at a rally at The Crown Center in Fayetteville, N.C., Tuesday, Oct. 28, 2008. (AP Photo/Carolyn Kaster)

Seven-week-old Rudy Sanderlin is held high at a campaign rally with U.S. Republican presidential nominee Senator John McCain (R-AZ) in Fayetteville, North Carolina October 28, 2008. REUTERS/Brian Snyder (UNITED STATES) US PRESIDENTIAL ELECTION CAMPAIGN 2008 (USA)

Oldest Child and Why We Love Books

2008-10-29T10:38:00.005-05:00

Oldest child, nearly 13, has loved books since she was 2 feet tall. Maybe even smaller than that. I've always had a lot of books, and I guess I passed that trait on. She taught herself to read at age 3, and by Kindergarten read at a 4th grade level. She hit 12th grade level in 5th grade, and is now in 8th grade and perusing my law school books. She has several bookcases that are overflowing and can't bear to throw out a book, even when its falling apart and pages are missing. She reads and rereads her favorites, and has read such masterpieces as Fahrenheit 451, Schindler's List, all the Harry Potter's, Lemony Snicket's, Eragon, pretty much any series... and even came home once with Gone with the Wind after her school librarian got sick of her reading short books and coming back every single day to the library to get a new book.

This love of books means at least 4 things: 1) she has a great vocabulary, 2) she is a great speller, 3) she doesn't always know how to pronounce the words, and 4) she sometimes gets difficult words meanings mixed up

Which leads to some really funny conversations.

Oldest: I wish 'insert sibling name' had some common courtesy (pronounced like core-te-sy and reminiscent of a southerner with an english accent)

Oldest: what exactly can they give a person to treat pschitzophrenia? (pronounced like shits-o-frenia)
Answer: maybe some pepto?

and then sometimes those similar medical terms get all mixed up in translation....

(while talking about people dying on the Mission Space ride at Epcot)
Oldest: i guess they had a hemmeroid...
Husband: people don't die from hemmeroids- they are painful, but I don't think they've ever killed anyone.
Oldest: isn't that when you have bleeding in your brain?
Husband: not unless you are a politician

and a recent favorite, where she turned a little passive agressive....

Oldest: I told this kid in my class who said he'd vote for Obama that he was mispronouncing it
Me: How did you tell him its pronounced?
Oldest: O-bama, as in Go Bama, Roll Tide
Me: What did he say?
Oldest: (laughing) Now he says he wants Gobama to be elected

I Wish I Drove an Unmarked Police Car

2008-10-28T14:18:00.005-05:00

I normally wouldn't post twice in one day, except today I am really really peeved about this. You got any thoughts about it.... throw them out there for me...

I went to pick up child #5 from the Mother's Day Out at a local church in our small rural town (see previous post). On the way, I drive right through town, which has a 40mph speed limit and one stoplight on a two lane state highway. Obviously, living in Tennessee, the area has a few hills, so there are some areas on the main road which happen to have a solid yellow "no pass" line.

As I am driving along, I notice a dark colored pickup truck that is tailgating me severely. If I had a hitch, I swear he would have just hitched up for the ride. I was doing exactly 40mph. I really wanted to hit my brakes and scare him into backing off, but before I could.....

he passed me.....

obviously going faster than the posted 40mph....

on a solid yellow line.....

as he is beside me I am tempted to honk my horn and give that special wave to indicate that the speed limit is 40mph, but I have tinted windows and so did he, so he probably wouldn't have seen me.

which is when I notice the license plate.....

is a Tennessee JUDICIARY plate!

I was furious! Now, I realize it may not have been a judge him/herself. Their families are also entitled to judiciary plates. And I don't expect any member of the judiciary to be perfect. But really? If you are going to advertise that you are judiciary, shouldn't you behave accordingly? Or are you hoping your judicial plate will get you out of that ticket for speeding and illegal passing? I mean, judges are subject to the ABA Model Code for Judicial Conduct, which specifically states in Canon 1:
"RULE 1.1
Compliance with the Law
A judge shall comply with the law,* including the Code of Judicial Conduct.
RULE 1.2
Promoting Confidence in the Judiciary
A judge shall act at all times in a manner that promotes public confidence in the independence,* integrity,* and impartiality* of the judiciary, and shall avoid impropriety and the appearance of impropriety."
And if you go to the definitional section:
“Law” encompasses court rules as well as statutes, constitutional provisions, and decisional law.
“Impropriety” includes conduct that violates the law, court rules, or provisions of this Code, and conduct that undermines a judge’s independence, integrity, or impartiality.
“Integrity” means probity, fairness, honesty, uprightness, and soundness of character.

Pretty sure that all means that judges are still held to obey the laws....

Maybe even to a higher standard than the rest of us common folk....

Including traffic laws....

So... driver of the dark colored pickup with the Tennessee Judiciary Plate #J124.....
If I find out who you are, you can bet your black robed bottom I will file a complaint about it.

Don't Trust Him

2008-10-28T10:35:00.005-05:00

According to the devil that is Wikipedia, my rural small southern town covers 8 square miles and has about 2000 residents including children. Of the approximately 600 families, 95% are white. I wouldn't characterize them as racist, but I'd be lying if I didn't admit I've heard people around here say they'd be first in line to shoot Obama (not the word they used) should he get elected. I'd say they are also pretty religious (considering there is no homework assigned on Wednesday nights so you can go to church and not worry about it). There are also a lot of hunters around- which I know from seeing dead deer dangling from trees and hearing gunshots consistently through the hunting seasons. Yards are littered with McCain/Palin and other republican yard signs, and cars are sporting McPalin bumper stickers with lipstick kisses. I'd say its a pretty conservative, republican area.So I went today to early vote. I didn't early vote last time and I got stuck in a 2 hour line in a sweat-stenched elementary school gym with a bunch of boot wearing gun toting republicans while the gym teacher freaked out over the future condition of the gym floor. I wanted to be proactive this time and get it over with. Early voting is at City Hall, a small room with a 200 person capacity with new carpet and clean paint.

When I got there, there were about 15 people in line in front of me. Not too bad. There was a younger lady working the first step of signing in, taking your ID and entering info into a computer to print out some sheet you sign that says what district you are in. She is doing this job probably because she is the only one who can really work a computer. Everyone else working the polls is at least 70, if not 80. They love this job and take it very seriously.

While in line, a young man about 20 years old comes in and goes to the elderly man sitting in a cushy chair supervising the workers. He tells the man he needs to sign in. The man tells him to get in line. He tells the man he is not here to vote, he is a poll-watcher. At this point, elderly man looks at him with disdain- and asks for ID. The young man gets his drivers license out while explaining this is his first time and he isn't sure where to sit, where to sign in, does he need a nametag? Elderly man takes his time examining the drivers license- long enough that young man says, "Is there a problem?" He is polite, but clearly uncomfortable. Elderly man returns license and says, "No problem yet... you can sit over there." Directing him to the most uncomfortable, isolated chair in the room.

At this point, elderly man approaches elderly women and they discuss young man- loudly enough for him to hear. While giving him the evil eye, they say "he'd better mind his P's and Q's." Well, he is from "_____" (which is a larger town about an hour away). Young man has obviously inspired a great amount of distrust. Bless his heart- he is just trying to be involved. The younger woman says there is a list in her briefcase for him to sign in and get a nametag and she will do all that in a minute when she gets time. For now.... he sits. In his little uncomfortable chair just watching people come and go. Small southern towns can be hospitable, but not if you are "some young buck", "probably an Obama supporter", who came "from ______" to make sure these dedicated election workers are doing their job properly. Don't trust him....

I Admit... I'm a Dork

2008-10-26T10:01:00.003-05:00

I am still really busy studying, I have added some other topics to review schedule. I haven't even had time to go back and find funny stories about my other 2 children- but not to worry they will come soon.

But, have you ever noticed that hearsay is just a hair off from heresy? There must be a reason.

Also, I discovered the following - law professors blogs
They have blogs for nearly every area of practice: criminal, evidence, trusts, torts, contracts, family law, immigration, civil procedure, environmental....
I spent a while just reading through the blogs, signing up for updates on ones that I thought were interesting, classes I have upcoming, and even reading past commentary on topics I am getting ready to take exams in. All of these blogs are written by law professors across the country. The evidence one is particularly interesting. I know not many of you are legal students, or even care about legal stuff, but if you do these are definitely worth checking out.

Creams and Lotions Not Necessary

2008-10-25T12:55:00.004-05:00

Since I am still bogged down in hearsay evidence and don't have time for much original thought (and because I still owe stories about my remaining kids)- here is an entry regarding child #3. She is the younger of my twins, my youngest girl, nearly 8, sensitive, loves animals, a little OCD sometimes, and probably has the sweetest heart of all my children.

This exchange took place about 6 months ago....

Husband and I were sitting on the couch in the living room and the kids were brushing teeth and getting ready for bed. Child #3 came out of my bathroom and stopped for a minute on her way through the living room. There was a commercial on TV- something for facial cream of some sort. You know, the kind that says if you use it you will not have a wrinkle to be found and look just as amazing as the woman on tv. She looked at us and said, "you know those commercials, they always have some lady bragging about how great she looks because she has some special cream, and all they are is people bragging about themselves and how good they look".

So Husband looks at her and says, "you know, mama uses those special creams".

At that point Child #3 gives him ’the look’. You know, the one that says ’I don’t believe a word you say, you are full of it, and you are rightly crazy’. Then she said, "mama doesn’t use those creams. She is prettier than those ladies and beautiful enough anyway".

I gave her a high five and told her she was awesome. When she walked away I told Husband that she is definitely my kid, and at least someone in our house knows how awesome I really am.

It just doesn’t get much better than that.

Mission Accomplished

2008-10-24T11:45:00.005-05:00

Yesterday I shared with you a story about my 5 year old adorable blue eyed ADHD older boy who is always into something. I decided that Just to be fair (and so that you don't get the impression that I love one child more than another) I will share something about each child.

Today we move on to my youngest boy and youngest child, my baby, Child #5, is a sweet easygoing 4 year old little mama's boy. He was the owner of Blue Stinky, which you can read more about here. He does not get in too much trouble, likes to play quietly, BUT he has been the most difficult child to potty train, and we've been working on it for a little over a year (since he turned 3). Unfortuntalely, the beginning of our potty training effort was hampered by his fascination with flushing. He loved to flush. Potty no. Flush yes. I figured it was a start though. Until we had small objects and toys start to go missing. Between all 5 kids we have taken up toilets in our house a total of 14 times. Usually we find soap, wads of paper towel, once we even found a Thomas the Train engine. Taking the toilet up and snaking the lines usually fixed our problems. Except this once....

Preface: It was my twin girls 7th birthday. They had a birthday party to go to for another little girl, and then we were going to have cake and open presents after dinner. We needed to leave the house around 12:30pm to get to the party.

12:00, I told the girls to get hair brushed and shoes on and be ready to go. Husband is just sitting down to watch the Titans game.
12:15, Child #2 and Child #4 come running in saying that the potty isn't flushing and water is going to overflow. Husband grabs the plunger and we go to investigate. The toilet in our half-bath is indeed clogged, however the water is clear. Husband says, "what got flushed?". No one knows. Child #5 gets blamed- mostly because he can't defend himself and probably had something to do with it. I take Child #5 aside and try to figure out what got flushed. No success. So, while Husband works on that bathroom, I go into our bathroom and realize that our potty isn't flushing either. There is now a much bigger problem.
12:45, the plunger is not working and all of our sinks and toilets are not draining. Husband and I venture under the house to start opening traps in the main line. We have a "snake" that we have used before- this is not our first dance with the unknown flushed object. Thinking ahead, we grab a couple 5 gallon buckets. We open the first trap furthest from the septic tank. We drain about 20 gallons of water, run the snake, and- we find no clog. We crouch down and go further under the house. The next trap is on the other end of the house, and next to the septic tank. This could be really bad. We open preparing for the worst, but there is no water. Which only means the clog is somewhere after the last toilet drains into the line and before the trap at the septic. But that is about 30 feet of line with a 90degree angle in it.
1:15 and I call a plumber. They can't come until at least 6pm, and it is going to cost at least $200 because its an emergency on a Sunday afternoon. Never mind, Husband says we can do this. He goes into our bathroom and removes the toilet. This is the closest opening to the clog and he is going to run the snake through. But the snake doesn't work. He is going to call Lowe's and rent a power auger. The guy at Lowe's explains that a power auger won't make a 90 degree angle either.
1:30. Husband goes across the street to consult with Fix-Anything Neighbor, and I call my grampa. Everyone reaches the same conclusion. There should not be a 90 degree angle. You need to cut that line, get the clog out, and put it back with some 45 degree angles. And add another trap while you're at it. We take a short break to discuss, Husband watches a few minutes of football, I grab a cup of coffee.
2:00. We travel to our closest gas station/hardware. They have a trap, the pipe, the cement, and just one 45 degree angle. So, we drive on to Home Depot. Husband and I discuss how excited we are to be able to spend time together working on a project and how much better this is than football. The Titans are losing at the half.
3:00. Back home with all the supplies. We have flashlights, tools, buckets, and we are ready. We go to the pipe and Husband begins to cut. Just a little and water starts pouring out. About 25 gallons of poo water later, we have cut through one section. We move around to the other side and begin cutting. More poo water. another 10 gallons later, we have cut through both sections. we can now see the clog. We can't tell what it is, but we run that snake through the pipe and whatever it is goes on to the septic tank. Good riddance.
4:20. Begin reassembly. I won't explain all the details, but suffice to say that sitting in poo water under the house, while covered in insulation, itching, cold, and wet- all while trying to cut, clean, and glue pvc together by flashlight is so much fun if I told you, you'd be jealous.
5:20 we have all the pipes together. Husband is worried about one joint, so he stays under the house while I go up to flush a toilet and run some water. No leaks. Now he can come up and we can reattach our bathroom toilet. I clean the floor, he replaces the toilet, I clean out the bathtub where the toilet sat, and we are home free.
5:45 I am itching like crazy from insulation. We missed the birthday party for the friend. We need a special birthday dinner for twin girls (aka Child #2 and #3). We have a cake, and we need to open presents. I take a quick shower.
6:30 we finally get to eat dinner, have cake, and open presents. I have been so excited by my afternoon of fun, I can hardly stand it. Oh, and the Titans lost.

Mission Remove From Poo- Accomplished.

Boys & Knives: Warning- Do NOT Mix

2008-10-23T07:37:00.005-05:00

Since I've been very busy studying for exams and recounting the frustrations of the rules of evidence would bore you all to tears, I decided to share a story I wrote in my real paper journal (gasp) about a year ago before I knew how much better the whole bloggie thing was. Everyone I told this story to at the time really got a good laugh. More importantly- heed my warning....

Preface: At the time, my older boy, child #4, was about 4.5 years old. He had already had 3 sets of stitches: one on the top of his head courtesy of his sister whacking him with a hand shovel in retaliation for him chasing her with a stick, one exactly a week later courtesy of another sister throwing a matchbox car at him during cleanup time and splitting his top lip entirely requiring a pediatric facial plastic surgeon, and the last set just above the eyebrow when he jumped out of his granddaddy's parked car and landed head first on the gravel section of the driveway. After the ER doctor recognized me on the second trip I asked him at what point they call DCS. Thankfully, he said they could tell the difference between abuse and a 'repeat offender'. The following story occurred about 6 months after the last trip to the ER....

We had a close call on round four of stitches today. And yeah, it was Child #4 again. What is the fascination with knives? Let us explore....
It all started when Child #4 came running from the kitchen holding an unsharpened pencil. I thought he was going to ask me to sharpen it, until he started screaming about blood. I took the pencil from his bloody hand, and as I ushered him back into the kitchen for a wet cloth I asked him what he had cut himself on. His answer, as he pointed to the counter, "that knife".
To summarize the next 5 minutes, I learned that he really thought he could sharpen the pencil himself with that hunting knife. I didn't even think to ask why he thought that, I just figured it was a little boy thing and I moved along to controlling the blood flow. We've had enough incidents I no longer panic at the sight of blood, its just another day.
After 15 minutes of sitting in my lap while I applied pressure to his injured fingers, my husband happened to call. He told me what he was doing, I told him about the bloody hand/knife incident. He immediately went quiet, then said, "well he couldn't have gotten the blade closed". At that point I knew he had more information. I had only identified it as a knife. He knew it was his hunting knife. How did he know? Because, "he saw me sharpen a pencil with it last night and I told him not to touch it."
Yeah, he told him not to touch it. Which in little-boy-speak means "touch it, touch it, touch it!!!" Of course, as soon as Child #4 realized I had just told Daddy what happened, he said, "oh, he's gonna be mad". He knew. He just really didn't care. And you'd think this whole incident would have turned him off from the knife. No. He actually laughed when the blood stopped and said, "see, I'm fine now". Which in little-boy-speak means, "I will do that again as soon as you aren't looking, so you'd better hide the knife now".
Consider the knife hidden.

Random Thoughts

2008-10-22T08:59:00.004-05:00

I've been really hitting the books hard for the last few days. Exams begin in less than 2 weeks. I did really well on midterms and thought that would alleviate some pressure during finals, but alas, it has only made more pressure to maintain the ground I made.

So, today I am making a list of some of the random things I thought of over the last couple days. If any of you have any answers or insight, I'd love to hear it. And now, I will leave you with these thoughts....

1. How is it possible to shed so much hair every time I shower, yet still have so much hair left?

2. Why does the doctors office always tell you to come early to fill out paperwork, but they are never ready when you get there?

3. If I am on the Do Not Call list, why can my phone company still call me every other day to sell me something?

4. Why aren't there more osteopathic doctors in middle Tennessee?

5. Why are gay guys more fun to hang out with?

6. Why don't our schools teach foreign languages in younger grades?

7. When does being eccentric turn into having a mental issue?

8. Why is no one complaining about welfare, when it costs the country about the same amount per month as the war- we have war protestors, where are the welfare protestors?

9. Are safety measures defeating the theory of natural selection and survival of the fittest?

10. Why does baking seem like so much more fun than cooking?

Vacation can be Dangerous...

2008-10-20T08:47:00.000-05:00

Well, we finally made it home last night around 5:30p.m. I am glad to be home and not, all at the same time. I am glad because now I feel like I can get back to my life, my routine, my 'things I need to do'. I am not glad because I miss the sunshine and sand, I have about 15 loads of laundry to do, and I am about 2 weeks out from final exams. But, overall, I am glad to be home again. I didn't lose my mind, or even any children (thanks for the reminder Sabrae...lol)

I had a whole long post about how spoiled some kids are and how not spoiled my kids are. About how I think sheltering kids will only lead to worse behavior later on. That I swear in front of my kids from time to time, and I certainly can't hide my smart ass attitude from them forever. They know I am a real person and real people are not always nice. On how my kids are not getting a raw deal because there are 'so many' of them and they have to share things, including my husband and I. That my kids know life isn't always fair. But I started looking at some of the pictures from our trip to show you that despite the fact that my kids do not have June Cleaver for a mother they are still happy, and I realized that you can probably tell a lot from the pictures I took.

We left my 12 year old at the campground one day because she didn't want to experience the magic that is Magic Kingdom a second time in the same trip. So some of our pictures only have 4 kids. The reality is though, some of them only had 4 kids even when she was with us (a little too good to have the picture made with Jasmine and Aladdin).

I let my kids play at, around, and in the ocean without life jackets or floaties. I was not even hovering inches away in case of some freak undertow. I took this picture with the furthest zoom I had because I was busy sitting in my chair drinking a beer and watching the kids enjoy the sun and sand.

There were jellyfish in the water. I even let my kids hunt and catch jellyfish with a net and bring them ashore for photo-ops.

And those are just a couple of the things that probably make all those scrapbooking, cupcake baking, politically correct, minivan driving, soccer (or hockey) watching, Martha Stewart moms out there gasp. There are more stories...plenty more... I just don't want to give it all away on my first day really back! So, before you call DCS and report neglected children because I actually refer to them as 'slave labor' while they are doing their chores around the house and not being paid for them.... here is a picture to prove that they are actually happy, well-adjusted little people....

Just One More Day

2008-10-14T20:09:00.001-05:00

Here is a brief rundown of the Disney highlights thus far...

We went to Magic Kingdom on Sunday. We got there around 9am. The kids loved Space Mountain. My 5 year old and I nearly got sick on the teacup ride. My 12 year old passed out (Yep you read it right) at a drinking fountain just outside the boat ride. I've never been to a first aid station in a theme park before but they are pretty pimpin- air conditioned, nice dark place to rest- I highly recommend it if you just need a nap while out theme parkin it. Seriously though, she is fine. We think she was just a little dehydrated and it was freakin hot out. We stayed for the light parade at night, but skipped the fireworks.

Monday we went to Epcot. My kids think the countries of the world section is b-o-r-i-n-g. They wanted to know where all the rides were. They liked the Fast Track there, where your car goes 60mph, but otherwise were unimpressed with the rides. I was excited they were having a wine festival, but how festive can it be when every glass (i.e. 4 ounce plastice cup) is $6.00? Not so festive. We had dinner with my grandparents who live nearby, then watched the fireworks. Grandparents paid for dinner- no small feat at any disney park- so a shout out to the grandparents! ;)

Today we went to Hollywood studios. The kids were all about the Tower of Terror, but they didn't get the Twilight Zone references. I really liked the Rock n Roller Coaster- an indoor deal sort of like Space Mountain, but faster, with black lights and neon, and with an Aerosmith theme. It played Aerosmith music, which I think made the ride. I actually saw them in concert once, and had backstage tickets to meet the band thanks to an old boyfriend. Steven Tyler is really short, but I've loved Aerosmith even more since that concert.

Tomorrow we are going back to the Magic Kingdom. The kids voted that their favorite park, and no one wanted to go to Animal Kingdom. My kids aren't into animal shows (or any shows) - they want rides. Big rides. Fast rides. Scary rides. Thrill rides. So, one more day of theme park madness and we will be done. Then on to Destin, or more acurately Santa Rosa Beach, for some wedding partying. Then on Sunday I will be clicking my heels 3 times while wearing my red sparkle shoes hoping to magically transport home so I don't have to ride in the car another 10-12 hours with the little people.....

Arrival at Last in (not so) Sunny Florida

2008-10-11T18:28:00.000-05:00

We left home last night around 5:45 and drove until about 3:15a.m. at which point we were just crossing the GA/FL state line. We stopped at a rest stop, hauled all the kids back into the camper, and slept until 7:15. We were back on the road by 8am, made a bunch of stops on the way to the campground, and finally got here around noon. While we were setting up the camper, we realized that somewhere along the way one of our roof vents got completely ripped off. Since it was sprinkling rain and dark clouds were looming, we decided a trip to Camper Connection for a new one was in order.
Dear husband thought for sure that Camper Connection was going to rip him off on a new roof vent, but it was only about $40. On the way back to the campground we took all 5 crabby kids to CiCi's pizza for an all you can eat buffet. I'm usually not big on buffets, but CiCi's has spinach pizza.
Back at the campground the kids watched a movie while husband disassembled the fitting on the old vent and installed the new one. About 10 minutes before he finished it started to rain pretty hard. Of course, right after he finished it stopped. I was a little tired of being stuck in the camper with the kids, so I went out for a quick smoke break and saw the coolest double rainbow- the bright one is in the correct order, the dimmer one on the left is in opposite color order. Whether you believe that rainbows are a sign from God or purely a scientific matter, I think a rainbow can make anyone smile.
Now it is raining again, but its also dark, and everyone is tired. The boys are watching TMNT, the girls are playing Uno, and for now everything is quiet.
Wish me luck tomorrow that I don't lose a kid (or my mind)...

Meme= Blanket

2008-10-10T07:33:00.000-05:00

Well, that is what I first thought of anyway. When Twisted Lisa tagged me, I checked out her most recent post titled, "What is a Meme?" I nearly laughed out loud, at my house a Meme (pronounced may-may)is a blanket. But that is not at all what Twisted Lisa meant. And I really must thank her for doing the research for me on exactly what a Meme is.
For those of you who may be uninformed (like me), here is the description provided by the all knowing Wikipedia: a meme "consists of any idea or behavior that can pass from one person to another by learning or imitation. Examples include thoughts, ideas, theories, gestures, practices, fashions, habits, songs, and dances. Memes propagate themselves and can move through the cultural sociosphere in a manner similar to the contagious behavior of a virus."

To Complete this Mission, here are the rules I must follow:

1- Link to the person who tagged you
2- Post the rules on your blog
3- Write 6 random things about yourself
4- Tag 6 more people
5- Let the taggees know they have been tagged by your taggedness
6- Let your tagger know when you have completed your meme quest of random goodies.

I can do this! Random is my forte!!!

1. My toes enjoy freedom. I hate to wear socks, even in winter. If I could wear flip flops all the time I would do it.
2. I only have one really close real life friend that is a woman, all the rest are men. I just think women are prone to shit-talking and backstabbing, they take things too personally, and I just don't do well with drama.
3. I hoard sentimental objects and hide them from my husband so he doesn't tease me about them. Most of them are under the bed or in the closet in the guest room.
4. I am a genealogy freak. I have planned trips to other states just so I could go to the cemeteries and take pictures of ancestors tombstones and then go to the courthouses and libraries and do research.
5. I love other cultures and languages. I wish I could speak 10 languages and teach my kids to do that as well. So far I have minimal spanish and even more minimal russian.
6. I really honestly believe that I could do any job in this world that I wanted to and be the very best at it. No joke. When I was little so many people told me I couldn't do things, and I am defiant by nature, I decided to prove everyone wrong. I was the black sheep of my family, always in trouble in high school. I know I am smart, and I know I learn quickly, and I know that I can do anything I want if I set my mind to it.

Now, for 6 more people....
1. Maybe Musings, Maybe More- I know she is capable of random thoughts
2. Back to Barnwell- I think his answers are going to be hilarious
3. My Therapy- I just started reading her blog, and its awesome
4. Lipstick at the Mailbox- she is just so cute
5. ....
6. ...... ack! I just don't have 6 bloggie friends!!! help!!!!

Anywho, I tried really hard, I think I gave you some awesomely random things to think about. I will go out and look for new friends just as soon as I get back from disney-mania with the ankle-bitters (aka Disney with the kids).

Analytics? What?!?!

2008-10-09T14:45:00.000-05:00

So, now that I am really getting into this blogging thing, and because I am horribly nosey, and because I really don't think anyone reads this crap, I am interested in these tracking thingies. One that has been mentioned more than once by more than one person is Google Analytics. So, I googled google analytics. It tells me to sign in, has me check the box about agreeing to their agreement, then provides me a code and tells me to put it in my layout, just before 'body' or some such thing.
I swear I have spent 30 minutes screwing with this and I still can't find body. In fact, I finally found template. I know, I am so un-computer-savvy. I see where this thing is supposed to go (I think). I just don't know where in there it goes.
And its only 2:45. My child (aka computer genius) doesn't get off the bus until 3:45. I have to wait a whole hour for her to come and help dear (old) mama figure out how to fix this junk and make it work. That is my mission for her- make it happen. Its a sad day when you are a grown person waiting on an 12 year old to fix your blog for you. And here I was thinking I was pretty freakin cool and all. *sigh*

Dude!!!! I'm done! All done!!!

2008-10-09T10:44:00.001-05:00

Well, not really. Just done with second year. I mean, our classes are done for the year, but we still have final exams to go back and take. And I probably should back up and tell you that we are on this weird school year schedule. Instead of the traditional Aug to May schedule, we have a Feb to Oct schedule with a "summer break" for 2 weeks thrown in there around June. Then our finals are the first 2 weeks of November (which you may recall from my post on taking a final on election night). At any rate, then we can take electives over the "winter term" which is from the end of Nov to the end of Jan with a nice break in there for Christmas.
So..... last night was my last night of real class!!! Its finally over! For now. Until finals. And then winter term. But don't get me down on that right now- I feel free!
This is really good news because I'd like to enjoy my kids fall break with them during our little trip to Disney to hang out with that huge rat (I know he says he's a mouse, but I think its a coverup). Sadly, I can't bring myself to leave all my study materials at home- I think I'd have withdrawals if I didn't have my books with me for 10 days, maybe even DT's and stuff, the whole nine yards- so I am taking stuff with me to get started on my review for exams. Sick, deranged, yes I know. But I've been attached to some legal book for the last 2 years, now its just a really bad habit.
Speaking of bad habits, a very 'organic' friend of mine was trying to convince me that my health was in danger. I drink too much diet coke and coffee she said. I smoke too much. On and on and on. The whole time I'm thinking- for the love of baby jesus, i'm in law school!!! But anyway, I let her go on for a while and then I finally just said- "well if its going to kill me anyway, I may as well go back to drinking vodka and smoking crack" (disclaimer, I do like some vodka, but I have never smoked crack). The look on her face was priceless. It was the look of horror- horror because she was pretty sure I was kidding, but then again, she wasn't really sure. It was hilarious. I really enjoy doing that to people. I have no filter sometimes. I really don't.
So anyway, just in case you are interested (and Twisted Lisa will totally get me on this one)- my finals are going to be in Evidence, Property, Remedies, and Civil Procedure.
Over the winter break I will be taking: Federal Courts (because eventually I will argue for the Supreme Court), and Environmental Law (no I am not a tree hugger, we just didn't have a huge selection)
Then in February I pick back up with a whole bunch of fun. Not every class is the whole year, but it would be a mess to try and explain exactly when I have what, but suffice to say from Feb to October, at some point, I will learn about the following: Moot Court Trial, Juvenile Practice & Procedure, Advanced Legal Writing, Ethics, TN Constitution, Wills & Estates, Estate Planning, Business Associations, Immigration Law.

Oh Happy Day!

2008-10-08T10:31:00.000-05:00

Since I am relatively new at this who blogging thing, I sometimes wonder if anyone is reading anything I say. But sometimes I say it anyway, and maybe someone stumbles across it.

But today, after the dreadful event that is called an orthodontic appointment, I now know someone reads my thoughts- and actually likes them! :)

So, Thank You, Thank You, Thank You to Twisted Lisa! She gave me this Kreativ Blogger award!
In honor of this award I am supposed to list 6 things that make me happy, and then ask 6 other blogger buddies to do the same. So.... here ya go!

1. My husband and children (if I listed them individually that would be 6 and I would be done, but that would also be a really boring list)
2. Coffee (especially Starbucks)
3. Law School (yes.... I know.... that is sick and deranged, yet true)
4. Peanut Butter Fudge Ice Cream (mmmmmm........ I can be bribed)
5. Sunny beaches (this one is self explanatory)
6. Peace and quiet (probably because I don't get enough of it)

And now.... 6 other bloggers:
1. Lipstick at the Mailbox - because I still know her husband better than her
2. Back to Barnwell - because he reminds me of some people I knew in high school
3. Maybe Musings, Maybe More - because she is a talented writer
4. Free Range Kids - because I refuse to shelter my children
5. Hillbilly Housewife - because I love to save money and be cheap
6. STLMurderBlog - because he provides a novel community service

Its raining, its pouring...

2008-10-08T10:21:00.001-05:00

7:00 a.m.
Child #1: I don't know why you made my orthodontist appointment for this morning at 8:45.
Me: I don't know either.
child #1: You know we get out of school early today.
Me: What?!?! I know of no such thing! Are you sure? Who said this?
child #1: yes, its report card day, we have a half day.
Me: sh*%#*$
child #1: by the time you get me to school, it will be time to come home.
Me: then I guess you aren't going to school today.
7:30 a.m.- leaving for orthodontist appointment
The entire drive along the winding country roads it was pouring rain.
I think the heavens are still crying over the less than thrilling debate last night.
I am kicking myself for:
1) not knowing it was a half day of school
2) not finishing the freakin evidence paper last night
3) making this stupid appointment in the first place
10:15a.m.- returning home from orthodontist
The sun has come out now.

MEMORANDUM

2008-10-07T09:30:00.000-05:00

To: Fellow Bloggers
From: Legal Diva
Re: Evidence Memo, Kiddie Commutes, and Debate Drudgery

Introduction
Today while all the kids are at school, my mission is to research and complete an evidence memo regarding hearsay expert witness testimony and how Crawford v. Washington applies. The remainder of the week will be spent: 1) getting child #1 to orthodontic appointment, 2) delivering class snack on behalf of child #4, 3) packing clothes for children #1-5 for trip to florida, and 4) separating Studies Weekly on behalf of teacher for child #4. In the midst of all this, I will be deeply saddened about missing the debates this evening which will be occurring less than a few miles from where I will be sitting, listening no doubt to some dull commentary on American Legal Remedies.

Discussion
I've spent hours reading cases and law review articles in preparation for this evidence memo. I feel that because this assignment is for extra credit points only I am prepared to write the memo at this point. I dread writing the memo, even though it will likely only take me 45 minutes, because I think: 1) I will only get 1-2 extra points for this, 2) my grade in evidence is good going into the final exam, 3) I've probably wasted 5 hours on this that I could have used studying for said exam, and 4) had I used said 5 hours I wouldn't need the extra credit in the first place.
As far as kiddie commutes, I don't know why I thought it was a good idea to get this stuff out of the way before our trip. In hindsight, I should know better than to schedule any appointment or commitment for the week leading up to a big trip. Mental note: do not do this again.
Were this not the absolute last night of class, I would be willing to skip class and come home to watch the debates. Unfortunately, the class begins at 8:10 and no amount of abbreviated class will help me get home (or anywhere else with a TV) before they end. Our final for this class also happens to be on Election Day- not as big of a deal though, since I have a feeling we are going to have a repeat of Election Day 2000 and the returns are going to be coming in late in the evening. By a miracle of the Gods, our class that day will also be ending at 8pm, which leaves plenty of time to see the west coast returns at the very least.

Conclusion
Today, and this week on the whole, are filled with busy drudgery. When I was little, all I wanted to do was be a grown up. Now that I am a grown up (which is still subject to debate), I just want to have a simple easy childlike life. Is that too much to ask? Apparently not, according to Walt Disney... he is going to make me a kid again all next week.

A Very Merry Unbirthday

2008-10-06T11:14:00.000-05:00

Sunday at lunch we had the long awaited birthday party. There are several reasons it was long awaited- 1) because when you are 4, you don't need a "stinky blanket", 2) because when you are 4 you get your favorite toy in the world- a Leapster, and 3) because when you are 4, you don't need a "stinky blanket".... wait did I say that twice? Obviously, child #5 and I have differing opinions on why its important to be 4. I am sick of his 4 year old, highly chewed on, raggedy, stinky blanket which is aptly named "blue stinky", and he is thrilled to get a Leapster. We made a deal. Sort of. For the last couple months we have been working up to this. When you are 4, you are a really big boy. Big boys don't need stinky blankets. Big boys love the Leapster we played with at a friends house. Big boys can trade in their stinky blankets for a new Leapster. Stinky will be put up "somewhere safe" and Leapster will take his place. (Yes, Blue Stinky has a gender, and it is a boy blanket). Because it was chewed on, it was always wet on the corner, and it smelled bad no matter how many times you washed it. Four years of chewing will do that I guess. Here you can see the damage done- the blanket was hand knit by my mother and used to be blue and sparkling white...

So, even though his birthday is not until next week, we did the party Sunday because we will be out of town on the actual birthday. Not that being out of town is a bad deal either- we are going to Disney for 5 days and then to Destin for a wedding. And Mickey Mouse won't let you visit his clubhouse if you are a baby who won't go potty and carries a stinky blanket. (Yes, I had several things I was using against stinky blanket). Anyway, its a good thing he doesn't know what day it is, because it sure wasn't his birthday, but we had the party and now he thinks he is 4 and a big boy. Stinky disappeared (into my closet), and Leapster is the new addition to our family. Just in time for a long car trip. Some of the other kids were none too thrilled that he got a Leapster, and I heard a lot of "you never get me (fill in the blank)". Yeah, well, its not your birthday.

We had one small issue with the new Leapster- it worked for a few minutes, then locked up, then quit. I could not get it to work. I took out the brand new batteries, tried other brand new batteries. No luck. So, I sent all the kids swimming with Daddy, and I hurried back to Target with a nonfunctional Leapster to exchange it. I went to customer service, explained the predicament, went and found a new one (which happened to be the last one in stock), and exchanged it to hurry back just in time. I did open the new one and put batteries in it and check it before I left Target just to be sure it was working properly. The new one works fine, and all is well again. It was a very merry unbirthday after all.

Was it Really a Debate?

2008-10-03T09:41:00.000-05:00

Well, I suppose so. But I think it was mostly a test of Sarah Palin. To see if she was everything that the Republican party said she was, and everything the Democratic Party said she wasn't.

So, because I really enjoy polictics, and I really enjoy bantering, I got myself a bowl of peanut butter fudge ice cream, a cup of tea, and sat down to enjoy the show.

Overall I think she did pretty well. She had intelligent answers, and the more comfortable she became the better her answers became. Some of the things I enjoyed:
1. At one point, she caught Biden in a misstatement. He answered a question, and she corrected him in a very Mom way- sort of the way I would when I know my kids are not giving me the whole story.
2. She gave a shout out to a bunch of 3rd graders- how many VP's have you ever known to give a "shout out"? Impressive.
3. She used plain language instead of senate-speak. I think this will go a long way with the average person. Technical answers in everyday words- something we all wish doctors could do more often. And sometimes attorneys.

And just to be fair to Biden, I really enjoyed an answer of his in which he said, "fun-damental". Go Biden- put the "fun" back in fundamental. I'm pretty sure he didn't mean it like that, but the emphasis he used made me laugh anyway.
One thing Biden said that didn't make sense- his party is against a troop surge. But then again, his party wants more troops in Iraq. Wait a minute.... isn't a surge the same thing as more troops? Is "more" less than "surge" like "a couple" is less than "a few"? Isn't it really the same difference? *sigh*..... politi-speak.

Next week is the big presidential debate here in Nashville. My mother in law lives about a mile down from the Curb Event Center. I wanted to go to her house and walk around and see the action- the news crews, the security, the demonstrators and protestors. Unfortunately I will be sitting in class that evening.

My Mother Is...

2008-10-01T15:27:00.000-05:00

Mine. According to the book at least. Unfortunately, My Mother is.... Crazy. And Crabby. She also lives next door. She also happens to work in the same industry as my husband, at a company partially owned by my husband. Therein lies the "drama of the day" with my mother.
Business has slowed down. The economy sucks and we work in real estate. People can't get loans to buy houses, so we are slower than usual for this time of year.
The majority owner of the company my mother works for had a meeting with the 3 other owners this afternoon (one of which was my minority owner husband). To make a long story short, they decided that if business doesn't pick up, my mom is the first to go. Mind you, the ONLY employees are the owner (an attorney), my mother, and one other girl who happens to also be a paralegal. They basically said by December 1, you may not have a job. This put my mother into drama stage. She has a part time job somewhere else, so its not like she would be unemployed. And she lives next door, has no mortgage, no car payment, and no bills. She could make it on her part time employment if she watched what she spent.
But, the big reason she is first to go is: she is a sourpuss. And if you try to tell her that, well, her feelings get hurt. So she asks me the questions that she really doesn't want the answers to. That is it in a nutshell. More on this later. Kids are nearly home from school.

Obscenity Found Its Way

2008-09-30T11:01:00.000-05:00

to our school bus. When I was younger, I only rode the bus for 2 years, in 7th and 8th grade. Otherwise I was a "walker" and trudged 10 miles to school each way, uphill, in the snow. Well... not really 10 miles, more like 2. And not uphill both ways, just one. But the in the snow part is totally true, at least for about 4-5 months out of the school year. Anyway, my 2 years on the bus are fairly unmemorable, except for the really cute neighbor kid that used to sing a song with my name in the title. No fights, no foul language, no rude or crude gestures. We waited at the stop, rode the bus, period.
Nowdays, things are a little different. Namely, in our small county, all the kids ride the same bus at the same time. In some ways this is a good thing- my older kids can look out for the younger ones. In some ways this is bad- my younger kids are now being subjected to the rantings of some very crude and undisciplined teenage boys.
My older child wrote a blog entry that detailed some of the language used on the back of the bus. Amazing! If I ever heard one of my kids talk like that I would wash their mouth out with soap. Either these kids parents don't realize what they are saying when they get on the bus, or they don't care. Rumor on the street is, the second scenario is more likely. Our bus route is said to be the "worst in the county". In fact, the Sheriff has been called upon before to follow the bus along it entire route from the school. A glimpse into the back of the bus reveals why. Now, I don't care if these kids want to use that language while they are at home, or hanging out with their buddies- I'm not their mama and it isn't my place to stop them. But- when they use that language in front of my kids, especially my 5 and 7 year olds- that is totally unacceptable. The problem is, what to do. If I throw a big fit, chances are some of the foulness will get turned on my older child who is in 8th grade. But if I don't, am I really protecting my kids? Is it enough to tell them that those words are not appropriate and shouldn't be repeated? I'm not saying my own language is pure, sure, sometimes I say things I probably shouldn't. But then again, I'm an adult. To every thing there is a season (turn, turn, turn)- and if I want to swear when some jerk pulls in front of me and nearly causes a wreck I can do that. But I'm not riding a bus with 30 kids under the age of 9 either.
So, what do you think? Am I being the overprotective helicopter parent? Or am I still the free range parent trying to set some limits on what my children are exposed to at appropriate ages? And how do I address my concerns without having this troupe of badly behaved boys turn on my kids?

If I were a Reasonable Person

2008-09-29T14:26:00.000-05:00

....I wouldn't be in law school. So goes the joke. But then I've never been accused of being reasonable anyway. Lately I have been a little disturbed about a comment made by a classmate in the course of a conversation- that I am an ass-kisser. I've never been accused of that either. Quite the opposite usually, I tend to rebel against authority. So I asked the obvious question- exactly whose ass do you think I've been kissing? He said he didn't know where to start but he could think of a few profs off the top of his head. Which was funny since we've only had 8 thus far, 4 each year. Now, contrary to what I would want people to believe, I can be nice. Actually kind. Even thoughtful. Obviously, this particular classmate sees that as ass-kissing. So be it. He couldn't give me one example of something I had actually done. And I should have let it go after that. For some reason though- I just can't get past it. What constitutes ass-kissing? Is kindness ass-kissing? Is legal discussion outside class ass-kissing? Is lunch in a pseudo-mentor way ass-kissing? I don't know, but I am fairly certain I don't do it. And maybe now that I have shared it, it can go by the wayside. Right next to my stick figure of a reasonable person.